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" The first house I bought was a little Spanish bungalow on Clinton Street in West Hollywood, right behind the Improv. I was renting it, and I asked the owners if I could buy it, and they were really nice and let me work out a deal. And I fixed it up and later sold it. That was when I realized that if you make some improvements, you can make money. "

Ellen DeGeneres

Money

Work

" Just go up to somebody on the street and say 'You're it!' and then run away. "

" My father was a first reader in the Christian Science Church, which is similar to being a preacher. There was no drinking, smoking or cursing. "

" There would be nothing to get me to run for president. I don't even understand how anyone would want that job at all. Although I would be able to play golf which I don't seem to have time now. "

Ellen DeGeneres

Golf

Job

" But seriously, I think overall in the scheme of things winning an Emmy is not important. Let's get our priorities straight. I think we all know what's really important in life - winning an Oscar. "

" People always ask me, 'Were you funny as a child?' Well, no, I was an accountant. "

" I was raised that you don't use something nice until there's someplace to go. "

Ellen DeGeneres

Nice

I Was Raised

" The stand up, everything was accidental. I never grew up and was the class clown and had to get the attention. It was - it really is, I have a career despite myself. "

Ellen DeGeneres

Stand

Myself

" I just like observing people - it's something I've done ever since I was a kid, and I got really good at it. That's a big part of why I became a comedian. My audience is filled with every kind of person you can imagine, and I love that. "

" I would love to have the same rights as everybody else. I would love, I don't care if it's called marriage. I don't care if it's called, you know, domestic partnership. I don't care what it's called. "

" I get those fleeting, beautiful moments of inner peace and stillness - and then the other 23 hours and 45 minutes of the day, I'm a human trying to make it through in this world. "

" So many people prefer to live in drama because it's comfortable. It's like someone staying in a bad marriage or relationship - it's actually easier to stay because they know what to expect every day, versus leaving and not knowing what to expect. "

" Whatever you define family as, family is just a part of belonging to something that takes care of you and nurtures you... and when you have lost that, and you want to get that back, it's pretty easy to get emotional about it. "

" The reason I do what I do is because I was influenced by Steve Martin, by Woody Allen, by Bob Newhart, by Carol Burnett, by Lucille Ball. "

" I'm a fan of people getting together. "

" While I was doing stand-up, I thought I knew for sure that success meant getting everyone to like me. So I became whoever I thought people wanted me to be. I'd say yes when I wanted to say no, and I even wore a few dresses. "

" I'm a lesbian, an Aquarian, and a vegetarian. "

Ellen DeGeneres

Lesbian

Vegetarian

" I grew up in a very conservative home. "

Ellen DeGeneres

Home

Grew

" I'm a comedian, and I definitely see the humor in a lot of things. I am also sad a lot. I cry often and easily. I think you're supposed to feel all kinds of things. "

" In the beginning there was nothing. God said, 'Let there be light!' And there was light. There was still nothing, but you could see it a whole lot better. "

" I've gotten to a place where I really am just settled. Really. "

Ellen DeGeneres

Just

Really

" I would love for the world to be happier. "

" We need more kindness, more compassion, more joy, more laughter. I definitely want to contribute to that. "

" When we were growing up our parents somehow made it clear that being famous was good. And I mistakenly thought that if I was famous then everyone would love me. "

" I think everybody should have the same anger towards the injustice that's happening and the hatred that's happening, and just fight it with love and compassion. "

" I know that every time I list something that I am, I am potentially alienating a whole group of people. Publicists and managers will encourage you not to say what political party you belong to, what you eat, what you don't eat, who you sleep with and all that stuff. "

" Comedy can be, especially in a writer's room, really aggressive, kind of a very male-dominated room, and it would be hard for women. It's not a nurturing place. It's not like a lot of women are going to say, I can't wait to live that lifestyle and be in a writer's room until 2 or 3 a.m. "

" I had everything I'd hoped for, but I wasn't being myself. So I decided to be honest about who I was. It was strange: The people who loved me for being funny suddenly didn't like me for being... me. "

" When people show me clothing that seems very, very feminine, it's hard for me to embrace that, because it just doesn't feel like me. "

Ellen DeGeneres

Show

People

" I have sadness in me. I have anger in me. I have heartbreak in me. "

Ellen DeGeneres

Sadness

Anger