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" The thing about living in the 21st century is you can get to fortysomething and not have anyone major in your life die. "

Douglas Coupland

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" Headwise, I always kind of knew that everyone goes grey in our family very early - and I was like, it works for me. I started growing my beard, and it changes the shape of your skull and your face, and I started seeing my mother's side of the family in myself for the first time. "

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" I've got 911 on speed dial. "

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" When I look at my daily schedule, I feel like a trout flopping about on a dock, drowning in the air. Some people are ruthless with their schedules. Not me. I wing it. "

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" If your life had lyrics, would they be any good? "

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" I miss the silliness of the Nineties. What would society be like if 9/11 never happened? If that silliness was extended forever? "

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" Handmade presents are scary because they reveal that you have too much free time. "

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" If I think too much about all of those Chinese factories where all the stuff in a Wal-Mart is made, I get that woozy feeling you get when you see ducks covered in crude oil. "

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" I've always felt like an alien trapped in a human form. We all do at some time or other; for me it's a permanent state, and I'm still unsure if Earth is a penance or a reward. "

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" Twinkies are more natural than most TV-interview shows. "

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" Given the infinite number of coincidences that could happen, very few ever actually do. The universe exists in a coincidence-hating state of anti-fluke. "

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" I know it's not cat food, but what exactly is it that they put inside of tinned ravioli? "

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" Everyone should have a tailor. David Wilkes, the guy who does my stuff, is like, 'Well you're a writer - do you want a special pen compartment or something?' Bespoke: That's the term you want to get out there. "

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" Gap clothing allows you to look like you're from nowhere and anywhere. "

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" Any passion to collect has some meaning behind it. "

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" We're rapidly approaching a world comprised entirely of jail and shopping. "

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" We want our idols to be dead because it makes death a much less scary place. "

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" Most people have no idea how to politely answer a phone. The English do, and it's been their only major business advantage for the past two centuries. "

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" Flying dreams mean that you're doing the right thing with your life. "

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" TV didn't kill radio, it just added something new to the mix. "

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" To have a healthy culture, you have to have stable health care financing and stable arts financing and stable sports financing, and if you don't have that, your culture becomes a parking lot. "

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" In the future, IKEA will become an ever more spiritual sanctuary. In the future, your dream life will increasingly look like Google street view. Everyone will be feeling the same way as you, and there's some comfort to be found there. "

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" I find it hard to believe that human beings are the crowning achievement of life on earth. Something better than us has to come along. "

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" I grew up in airports and on air bases. I know what flying and airports can be. And most airports make me feel like we're about three per cent better than ants. Especially U.S. airports. They're zoos. All civility is gone. "

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" No-tech tourism is a form of temporal eco-tourism in which one reads books or watches film and TV precisely because of the absence of 21st-century technologies. "

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" On TV people look at your hair and then they look at your skin, and then they look at your clothes, and by the time they're listening to what you're saying, you're off the screen. "

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" I decided at 40 I was wasting entire chunks of my brain and didn't want to blow my one chance on Earth. I'm glad I made that decision. Writing is largely about time, while visual art is largely about space. Sometimes, as with film, you can hybridize, but I think it's basically the space part of my brain wanting equal footing with the time part. "

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" Sometimes the best lighting of all is a power failure. "

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" The neighborhood I grew up in had this fence that surrounds the watershed. And if you go on the other side of that fence, there's nothing until the North Pole and down to Siberia. It's the absolute cutoff point between man and nature. "

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" There are three things we cry about in life, things that are lost, things that are found, and things that are magnificent. "

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" Sometimes it feels as if everything in life is just something we haul into the grave. "

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