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" When I came up to bat with three men on and two outs in the ninth, I looked in the other team's dugout and they were already in street clothes. "

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" Phil Niekro and his brother were pitching against each other in Atlanta. Their parents were sitting right behind home plate. I saw their folks more that day than they did the whole weekend. "

" I used to soak my mitts in a bucket of water for about two days. Then I'd put a couple of baseballs in the pocket and wrap it up with a rubber band. Today you don't have to do that, because catchers' mitts are more like first baseman's gloves. "

" After getting out of the service and going into baseball I never wanted to do anything else. "

" Where would I be without baseball? Who am I without baseball? "

" Let's face it. Umpiring is not an easy or happy way to make a living. In the abuse they suffer, and the pay they get for it, you see an imbalance that can only be explained by their need to stay close to a game they can't resist. "

" Baseball hasn't forgotten me. I go to a lot of old-timers games and I haven't lost a thing. I sit in the bullpen and let people throw things at me. Just like old times. "

" I didn't get a lot of awards as a player. But they did have a Bob Uecker Day Off for me once in Philly. "

" I hope the fans have enjoyed listening as much as I've enjoyed doing the games. I don't ever go to the park where I don't have a good day. I don't like losing. But I don't think I ever go to the park where I have a bad day. I don't think once. "

" I had slumps that lasted into the winter. "

" How do you catch a knuckleball? You wait until it stops rolling, then go pick it up. "

" Sure, women sportswriters look when they're in the clubhouse. Read their stories. How else do you explain a capital letter in the middle of a word? "

" The biggest thrill a ballplayer can have is when your son takes after you. That happened when my Bobby was in his championship Little League game. He really showed me something. Struck out three times. Made an error that lost the game. Parents were throwing things at our car and swearing at us as we drove off. Gosh, I was proud. "

" I signed a very modest $3,000 bonus with the Braves in Milwaukee. And my old man didn't have that kinda money to put out. "

" Hey, I think it's easy for guys to hit .300 and stay in the big leagues. Hit .200 and try to stick around as long as I did; I think it's a much greater accomplishment. That's hard. "

" If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to? I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter. "

" I was acting when I was playing baseball. "

" We were on for six years. We were in syndication for a while. It had its run. I still see the people from 'Mr. Belvedere,' too. We stay in touch. "

" Sporting goods companies pay me not to endorse their products. "

" I think my top salary was maybe in 1966. I made $17,000 and 11 of that came from selling other players' equipment. "

" I set records that will never be equaled. In fact, I hope 90% of them don't even get printed. "

" You know, I was once named Minor League Player of the Year... unfortunately, I had been in the majors for two years at the time. "

" Not bragging by any means, but I could have done a lot of other stuff as far as working in films go and working in television... I had chances to do that stuff, but I like baseball, I really do. "

" Career highlights? I had two - I got an intentional walk from Sandy Koufax and I got out of a rundown against the Mets. "

" Anybody with ability can play in the big leagues. But to be able to trick people year in and year out the way I did, I think that was a much greater feat. "

" I just grew the hair on my back. Facial hair just wasn't appealing to me. I liked it on my back, though. "

" I did stand-up, weird and ignorant stuff about my career - anything for a laugh. "

" I knew when my career was over. In 1965 my baseball card came out with no picture. "

" People have asked me a lot of times, because I didn't hit a lot, how long a dozen bats would last me. Depending on the weight and model I was using at that time - I would say eight to 10 cookouts. "

" The way to catch a knuckleball is to wait until it stops rolling and then pick it up. "

" I make fun of situations and try and find the humor in things, but it's never at the expense of the other guy. "