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" Why buy a book when you can join a library. "

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" I think it's important to hold a mirror up to society and yourself. "

" I think comedies should be short. I don't want to be self-indulgent; I don't want a two-hour comedy. "

" I don't care whether people say, ''The Office' is rubbish, 'Extras' is worse, 'Flanimals' is a waste of time. He's not funny; he never has been. I hate him.' I don't mind that at all. In fact, not only do I expect it, I celebrate it, because I think the haters are really important. "

" Oh, let's face it: I hate everything in others. "

" I like flying to New York from London. It's like a day off for me. No phone or e-mails. Food, wine, iPod, movies, snoozing. "

" I really just want to make Karl Pilkington the new messiah. "

" With Netflix, I browse; I watch documentaries about things I'd never dream of, but I think, 'I might as well.' "

" Proper stupidity is fascinating. "

" Stupidity without malice isn't horrible; some people can't help it. "

" Your reputation is still the most important thing that you've got. "

" That's the buzz for me, the creative process. An idea is never as good as when it's in your head. And then it's just how little you ruin it. "

" The second series is always my favourite as a writer/director; you can hit the ground running... so that's fun. "

" I was very protective of my privacy. I didn't want people to write bad things about me that weren't true, because that's just not fair. Fifty percent of everything written about me is wrong. "

" Everything I do is somehow rooted in humanity. It's always about people; it's always about ego. It's always about desperation. It's quite existential. You know, 'Am I leading a good life?' That might be because I'm an atheist, and I think this is all we've got, so you better be nice. And have fun. "

" I find comedy easy, and I find drama exciting and tantalising. "

" I like the ironic pomposity of a stand-up comedian. Like all those comedians thinking they can bring down Coca-Cola. They forget to be funny. "

" A couple of people I knew went to university apart from me, but all the way through I was the smartest kid in the school. That's luck, but I was proud of it. And I was also proud of doing well without trying. As you get older, and it took me a long time to realise it, that's a disgusting attitude, revolting. "

" Free speech is one of the most important things to me, but I think it gets confusing when it comes to offense. Because for one, just because you have the right to say anything, it doesn't mean you have to. "

" What makes 'Derek' a different kind of sitcom - if it is even a sitcom - is its sincerity. "

" I don't like it when I see a racist comedian go up and say, 'What are we gonna do about all these immigrants?' and they get a round the applause. I think, 'Well that's not a joke. That's just your biased opinion.' "

" Where there's a will - there's a relative! "

" I think Dustin Hoffman has been in at least three of my favorite movies of all time with things like 'Tootsie,' 'Marathon Man.' Getting a bit more arthouse and darker, 'The Graduate' - incredible, barrier-breaking movie, 'The Graduate.' "

" I think you can make fun of anything except things people can't help. They can't help their race or their sex or their age, so you ridicule their pretension or their ego instead. You can ridicule ideas - ideas don't have feelings. You can ridicule an idea that someone holds without hurting them. "

" Even I can't talk about myself for an hour. "

" As an artist, you want as many people as possible to see your work with no interference. And usually, I've gone onto fringe channels: BBC Two, HBO, Channel 4. "

" Making people laugh is easy for me. I'm quite proud of that. But I'm prouder of silencing an audience for a minute because they're thinking about something. "

" When I was about to be famous, I feared it on a few levels. I feared it because I didn't want people to lump me in with those people who'd do anything to be famous. I didn't like the word 'celebrity.' I feared intrusion, you know? Make me famous, and suddenly you can go through my trash bins. "

" I remember asking my mum when I was about 13, 'Why are my brothers and sister so much older than me?' And she just said, 'You were a mistake.' And I laughed. "

" Cynicism, to me, is trying to make people as unhappy as you are. "

" Even on the stage, I've played a bit of a persona, and the persona I played was a much brasher, more arrogant, less aware, less educated version of me. "