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" A U.S. dollar is an IOU from the Federal Reserve Bank. It's a promissory note that doesn't actually promise anything. It's not backed by gold or silver. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Dollar
Gold
Silver
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" The baby boomers' politics have covered a wide band of silliness, from the Weather Underground to the Timothy McVeigh types. The great majority of us are well in the middle of that spectrum, but still, there's been both leftie silliness and right-wing silliness. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Politics
Weather
Us
" In a free country, government is a dull and onerous responsibility. It is a parent-teacher conference. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Dull
Responsibility
Government
" Jack Abramoff is the world's best lobbyist - for the Federal Penitentiary System. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Jack
Best
Federal
" Public schools helped create the idea of America and inculcate Americans with a few rudiments of knowledge. To judge by that very American item, the Internet, a few rudiments is all anyone cares to have. "
P. J. O'Rourke
American
America
Internet
" All change is bad. But sometimes it has to be done. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Bad
Change
Done
" More modern poetry is written than read. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Than
Read
Modern
" If you spend 72 hours in a place you've never been, talking to people whose language you don't speak about social, political, and economic complexities you don't understand, and you come back as the world's biggest know-it-all, you're a reporter. Either that or you're President Obama. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Speak
Place
People
" Liberals are always proposing perfectly insane ideas, laws that will make everybody happy, laws that will make everything right, make us live forever, and all be rich. Conservatives are never that stupid. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Rich
Always
Happy
" The words 'Space Age' have a quaint, nostalgic tone - sitting on midcentury modern furniture watching 'The Jetsons.' "
P. J. O'Rourke
Space
Age
Furniture
" Lyndon Johnson faced some clear moral issues. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Moral
Clear
Issues
" We loved cars until the '70s or so. Then they became appliances. They turned into motorized cup holders. Most of it has to do with urban sprawl. What began as pleasure ends up in necessity, as so many things do. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Up
Things
Cup
" The anti-individualist enemies that Ayn Rand battled are still the enemy, but they've shifted their line of attack. Political collectivists are no longer much interested in taking things away from the wealthy and creative. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Line
Attack
Creative
" There are 1.3 billion people in China, and they all want a Buick. "
P. J. O'Rourke
China
Billion
Want
" Hubris is one of the great renewable resources. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Renewable
Great
Resources
" I knew Hunter Thompson since the '70s, and I loved him, but he would wear me out as I got older. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Got
Older
Me
" If government were a product, selling it would be illegal. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Government
Would
Selling
" Adam Smith pointed out that there were three things that make us more prosperous, in a general sort of way: freedom to pursue our own self-interest; specialization, which he called division of labor; and freedom of trade. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Own
Three
Way
" Banning paper and plastic and making shoppers carry their groceries home in their mouths like dogs is just the thing to make a little tin humanist in the Obama West Wing think he's admiral of the Uzbek Navy. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Navy
Dogs
Home
" In theory, taxes should be like shopping. What I buy is government services. What I pay are my taxes. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Taxes
Government
Like
" In Toledo, people grow out. Out to the suburbs. Out to the parts of America where the economy is more vigorous. And all too often, out to 48-inch waistbands. "
P. J. O'Rourke
More
Grow
People
" The District of Columbia is an extreme example of disconnect between financial input and educational outcome. Unfortunately, extreme is not the same as abnormal. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Example
Same
Outcome
" Arab-led Islamic fundamentalism destabilizes nations from Algeria to the Philippines. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Algeria
Islamic
Nations
" Only a few good leaders have paused to reflect seriously on being leaders. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Reflect
Leaders
Seriously
" Conservatives really don't believe in politics as the primary instrument of getting along in life and therefore don't tend to put their energy into it a way people left of center do. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Energy
Politics
People
" Why can't death - if we must have it - be always glorious, as in 'The Iliad?' "
P. J. O'Rourke
Glorious
Always
Why
" The First Amendment only says 'Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion.' It can disrespect all it wants. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Law
Religion
Congress
" You can't get rid of poverty by giving people money. "
P. J. O'Rourke
You
People
Money
" As a longtime former resident of 15 years in Washington, I wish that everybody would stay off the Mall with their political cause so that we can get out there, you know, and play flag football or Frisbee, or walk the dog or something - you know, which is, you know, what the National Mall should be for, in my personal opinion. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Walk
Political
Football
" Term limits aren't enough. We need jail. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Need
Term Limits
Enough
" In its worse forms, conservatism is a matter of 'I hate strangers and anything that's different.' "
P. J. O'Rourke
Matter
Strangers
Hate