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" The reason I take Rush Limbaugh seriously is not because he's offensive or right-wing, but because he is one of the few people addressing a large group of disaffected people in this country. And despite his frequent denials, Limbaugh does indeed have a somewhat cult-like effect on his ditto heads. "

Molly Ivins

Country

People

Seriously

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" Some days, I'd feel better with Punxsutawney Phil in the Oval Office - at least he doesn't lie about the weather. "

" The Internet goes doot-doot-doot - it goes sideways. There's nothing hierarchical about it. And the best thing about it is also the worst thing about it, which is there are no gatekeepers on the Internet. Consequently, there's a whole lot of bad information on the Internet. But I think that sorts itself out over time. "

" I never saw anything funnier than Texas politics. "

" Arkansas, the state Bill Clinton loves and that loves him back, is a place with just no pretension at all. "

" Laws were changed and regulations repealed until an Enron can set sail without responsibility, supervision, or accountability. "

" Naturally, when it comes to voting, we in Texas are accustomed to discerning that fine hair's-breadth worth of difference that makes one hopeless dipstick slightly less awful than the other. But it does raise the question: Why bother? "

" I spend most of my life feeling like I've been shot out of a cannon. "

" Rush Limbaugh's pathetic abuse of logic, his absurd pomposity, his relentless self-promotion, his ridiculous ego - now those, friends, are appropriate targets for satire. "

" I want to point out, there are a lot of politicians who enjoy the political end of politics, but they're not interested in governance. And then, there are some that are really interested in governance and are just terrible at politics. "

" Rove, of course, is an exceptionally good, exceptionally skillful campaign guy, and Bush himself is really gifted at the political end of politics. But he's always been, as he says, misunderestimated. "

" One nice thing about the benefit of long experience with la frontera is that we in Texas don't have to run around getting all hysterical about immigrants. The border is porous. When you want cheap labor, you open it up; when you don't, you shut it down. It works to our benefit - it always has. "

" Don't get me started about the media double standard. "

Molly Ivins

Media

Double

" I couldn't find any way to tell the truth in a regular newspaper. "

" I believe in practicing prudence at least once every two or three years. "

" People asked me during the Iraq war if I was afraid to speak out. I said no. "

" I don't have any children, so I've decided to claim all the future freedom-fighters and hell-raisers as my kin. "

" Raise hell - big time. I want y'all to get out there and raise hell about damned near everything. My word, there's a world out there that needs fixing. Get out there and get after it. "

" One thing I have learned from Johnny Faulk, Texas, and life, is that since you don't always win, you got to learn to enjoy just fightin' the good fight. "

" Keep fighting for freedom and justice, beloveds, but don't forget to have fun doin' it. Lord, let your laughter ring forth. Be outrageous, ridicule the fraidy-cats, rejoice in all the oddities that freedom can produce. "

" We should all laugh more at our elected officials - it's good for us and good for them. "

Molly Ivins

Elected Officials

Laugh

" I've said it before: War brings out the patriotic bullies. In World War I, they went around kicking dachshunds on the grounds that dachshunds were 'German dogs.' They did not, however, go around kicking German shepherds. "

Molly Ivins

World

Dogs

" New York is just as provincial as anyone else. "

" The thing is this: You got to have fun while you're fightin' for freedom, 'cause you don't always win. "

" How come trying to explode myths about Texas always winds up reinforcing them? "

Molly Ivins

Always

Trying

" Fourteen-year-old boys are not part of a well-regulated militia. Members of wacky religious cults are not part of a well-regulated militia. Permitting unregulated citizens to have guns is destroying the security of this free state. "

" In all my fantasies, I always assumed I would get married and have six children along the way with the greatest of ease. "

" Next time I tell you someone from Texas should not be president of the United States, please pay attention. "

" There are times a country is so tired of bull that only the truth can provide relief. "

" When satire is aimed at the powerless, it is not only cruel - it's vulgar. "

" I have been attacked by Rush Limbaugh on the air, an experience somewhat akin to being gummed by a newt. It doesn't actually hurt, but it leaves you with slimy stuff on your ankle. "