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" There are schools for weird children now. There wasn't when I was young. "

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" I've taught in prison; I've counseled people... I've been arrested; I've been to the psychiatrist. "

" I read, every day, the 'Wall Street Journal''s editorials because I like to think how my smart enemy thinks. "

" I want to be commercial. I'm never the person who says, 'I don't care if people don't see my movies.' I always want people to see my movies. "

" I'd be arrested if I still smoked because I'm the one who would be changing the battery in the airplane in the lavatory to take out the smoke detector. I would've been those people they warn you against. "

" I've been an art collector since the Sixties, and I kept it very separate from my showbusiness career. I've had art shows since the early Nineties, a museum show that travelled to four countries. I've had three or four art books; it's just another way I have to tell stories. "

" Grade school ruined reading for me by demanding book reports for such snore-a-thons as Benjamin Franklin's biography written for children. "

" If I'm seeing a three-hour foreign film, I don't want to watch it in a bed. "

" Underground, raw movies that come out of nowhere and change everything - they aren't slick-looking. But I have nothing against slick-looking as long as the scripts are funny. "

" I do take a one-week vacation every year, and I go to London in the fall. "

" My main residence is Baltimore. I have an apartment in New York, one in San Francisco, and I live in a rental in Provincetown in the summer. "

" I grew up in Baltimore, which is, you know, a city of extremes certainly, but my parents were very conservative. But they made me feel safe, and even though they were mortified at what I was doing, they encouraged it. I think because they thought, what else could I do? "

" I don't believe that we should never not talk to people we don't agree with politically. If you can make that person laugh, it's the first step to getting him to listen to change their mind. "

" Everyone's sex life is funny except your own. Every person's is, and yours never is. "

" I believe if you come out of a movie and the first thing you say is, 'The cinematography was beautiful,' it's a bad movie. "

" 'Hairspray' maybe did change people's minds, and that's how you get your political enemies to change their minds - by making them laugh and making them look at something in a way they haven't seen it. Not by preaching and cutting them off and being a separatist. "

" My father was horrified by my movies, yet he lent me the money to make the early ones. And I paid him back with interest. "

" To me, the most important thing is the script. I would never make a movie that I didn't write. I wouldn't know how to. "

" I'm thrilled to have a completely new audience that I can get from Court TV, without it being my own trial. That was the only other way I would have gotten it. "

" If I made a film today, it would certainly be on digital. "

" I like art. It's another way to rebel. "

" Science fiction is something I never understood. "

Science Fiction

" I always was a weird child. My mother told me the story that, in kindergarten, I would come home and tell her about this weird kid in my class who drew only with black crayons and didn't speak to other kids. I talked about it so much that my mother brought it up with the teacher, who said, 'What? That's your son.' "

" I'd love to sell out completely. It's just that nobody has been willing to buy. "

" Liberal censors are the worst. I don't remember any trouble with 'Serial Mom' or 'Cecil B. Demented' or any of them. Except 'Cry Baby.' "

" My mother's brother became the undersecretary of the interior for Nixon, which did cause a little drama in my family because I was going to riots and everything, but he turned out great and gave us a nice cheque for an AIDS benefit we had for the 'Serial Mom' premiere. "

" I wish something on T.V. would trouble me. Then maybe I would watch it. "

" I always had a work ethic. And I think I very much got that from my father and my mother. "

" It's still possible to make movies. Not so much on YouTube. On YouTube, you wind up with an advertising career. What movie became infamous and a hit because of YouTube? Maybe there is one. I don't know. "

" I don't trust anyone that hasn't been to jail at least once in their life. You should have been, or something's the matter with you. "

" The first record I got, I think I stole. I was with my mother; she turned her back, and I slipped it in my coat. And I think it was 'Cry Baby' by The Bonnie Sisters. That or 'Lucille' by Little Richard. "