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" When I play poker, I don't like losing the pot. "

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" I'm not against ratings per se. I think more information is always good. But I certainly don't think the government has to step in and set guidelines for how shows should be rated. "

" I don't know, people take chances on stage. It's a big free speech zone, a comedy show. So sometimes things happen, you say things that are a little bit off the edge. "

" At 'Price Is Right,' people feel so safe there and loved. And if you can't jump around on 'Price is Right,' then you can't jump around anywhere, you know? "

" I've always got stuff in my head in case I meet somebody like Steven Spielberg or someone like that, where I can hopefully say something to them that nobody else has ever said and get a laugh out of them. "

" I always thought I was going to die before I was 60. "

" I love Las Vegas. I like that Las Vegas has everything. Everything and anything you want to do, you can do in Las Vegas. You can pretty much do it all day and all night if you want to. "

" There's nothing like the energy in a small comedy club room or a small theater when it's going really well. I can see everybody's face practically in the whole room. There's no cameras in the way, and it's just me. "

" TV is easier: it's all planned out for you, and the audience is there to see a show and they are all pumped up, but when you are in a comedy club, you have to be really funny to win them over. To me, that's more pure. "

" We'll never see national shows with 45 shares again. "

" I'm down to earth; people sense that and they appreciate it. "

" Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called everybody, and they meet at the bar. "

" I'm competitive at everything. "

" I don't miss the economic insecurity, the living paycheck to paycheck. "

" Everybody in Hollywood loves symbolic gestures. "

" I am never out there just jogging for the heck of it. I never do that. I start to run with a goal in mind, whether it's a certain time or certain distance or a specific heart-rate goal, and then I am done. "

" Even when people are rich and successful on TV shows, there's always some trouble - you have to poke holes in them, throw them out of a job, put a pie in the face. "

" Hollywood people are filled with guilt: white guilt, liberal guilt, money guilt. They feel bad that they're so rich, they feel they don't work that much for all that money - and they don't, for the amount of money they make. "

" I'm the kind of person that likes what I'm doing when I'm doing it. "

" I've got to say that I don't see myself as some sort of political type like Alec Baldwin or Barbra Streisand. I don't want to come across like that. I'd be embarrassed if that was the way I came across. "

" Being a celebrity, you always get really good seats to sporting events, but you never get as good seats as the photographers get. And I really love sports. "

" Like I said, all comedy is based on exaggeration, big or small, whatever you can get away with. "

" I'm never afraid to die. I think that's the best thing that can happen to somebody is they get to move on and do something better. "

" I was in the band when I was a kid, I played the trumpet. "

" I used to go to the Cleveland Comedy Club all the time. If there was a comic I liked, I'd go see him two or three times that week. Bob Saget was one of those guys. "

" That's the great thing about having your friends around you. I've known these guys forever. I really enjoy their company just as people. You couldn't ask for a better work environment. "

" After all, game shows are not like working in a coal mine. "

" It doesn't matter how smart you are; to audition for 'Jeopardy,' you just have to luck out and know what they're asking you that day. "

" I don't care if my jokes are appropriate for a kid. "

" I actually was worried about the pounding, but I actually love running more than working out on the elliptical. Now if I get on the elliptical, I feel like I'm trapped. "

" I do get the comics online I guess but it's such a pain. I'd rather just get them in the paper and read them. "