Get QuoteDark Inspirational Quotes App

" Why should I be feeling tension? It's The Daily Show. "

Related Quotes:

" The show is a satire, which gives us freedom to do anything we want. Satire is the magic word that wipes away any culpability. The media is jealous of this freedom. "

" I remember saying in college that I would never do commercials. "

" I didn't hang any pictures in my office for a year because I thought that I would be jinxing myself and have to take them down the next day. "

" It's like every day I'm born anew, without Jesus. "

" Pat O'Brien knows nothing. He's on the Hell express. "

" If you have a secret, people will sit a little bit closer. "

" People want other people to know that they share our sensibility even if they're not exactly sure what that sensibility is. "

" I was going out for absolutely everything that was in Backstage. "

" If people see me in some sort of niche, then that's fine. As long as it's not The Naked Guy, I don't care. "

" I want to manufacture a feud. "

" Sometimes we have to actually say, I think you're really funny, but none of your jokes are going to make it on the air. So just answer my questions. Seriously. "

" Ethanol is, in its pure form, just as much of a sham as oil. "

" I don't feel like I even need to contribute. "

" The first year or so on The Daily Show is pretty intense in terms of travel. You're going to the worst places in the country, talking to the craziest people in the world. "

" I learned more about elections on election night 2000 than I ever did during my 16 years of schooling. "

" I remember interviewing someone I actually felt bad for, and therefore didn't want to take an ironic stance against him. It actually turned out to be a really funny piece. "

" The head writer loves that my character is a boor. "

" I don't know how this company got the name National Shakespeare Company, because it was literally like retards employing retards. "

" I have to stay true to myself. "

" I didn't really feel 100 percent comfortable until we started working on the 2004 election. "

" I get all of my comedy from CNN. "

" Apparently it's cool to watch The Daily Show. "

" This limited theatrical release was a nice little bonus that I never expected. "

" Wow. I am really pretentious. "

" I just want to do cool stuff. "

" I've got like a week and a half left, all bets are off. "

" I actually got the part. And I thought, Well, I'll do it for a while. I'll just quit if it's stupid. "

" Once I found out how much an Off-Off-Broadway actor makes, I was whoring myself out the next day. "

" I touched an Oscar once. Friend of mine has one, for writing. As soon as I touched it, he said, Now you'll never win one. "