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" Women with low self-esteem love bad boys. Women who have work to do love bad boys. Women who love themselves love good men. "
Tracy McMillan
Women
Bad
Men
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" Yes, I have 'failed' at marriage - a lot. "
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" I'm the straight-talking woman in your life who is going to be really honest with you, but come from a place of love. I'm not talking down to you; I do this from my heart. "
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" Being all about me is not a good thing - I don't care what 1978 tried to say - because as long as you mostly think about yourself, you're not going to be a wonderful person. You're just not. "
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" Somehow, married or single, we'd rather anesthetize ourselves with love substitutes than go for the real thing, because let's face it: The real thing is pretty scary. "
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" The deal is: most men just want to marry someone who is nice to them. "
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" Is our desire for partnership just an evolutionary remainder, a Togetherness Delusion, where millions of women only think they need a relationship to be truly happy? Maybe. But you know what? That's fine with me. "
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" All of us, consciously or unconsciously, set out to have the best possible love life. Valentine's Day simply shines a light on the degree to which that didn't - or hasn't yet - materialized. "
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" There is no such thing as 'getting' a guy, house and kids. There is only surrendering to them. "
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" Rather than diminishing the idea of 'truly needing' a relationship - and trying to deny it, shame it, or talk ourselves out of it - why not just celebrate it? It's exactly what the world needs. "
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" For every year past the age of 27, you need to take another step toward commitment somewhere in your life. Instead of freelancing, you get a staff job. Instead of renting, you buy. Fine, instead of couch-surfing, you rent. "
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Job
Age
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" A sure-fire way to know you're crazy is if more than one person has told you you'd be great on a reality show - and you agree with them. "
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You
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Reality
" We have this false idea in our culture that if you haven't made it by 30, then you're never going to do anything interesting. My 40s have been the most incredible time of my life. "
Tracy McMillan
Never
My Life
Culture
" Women blame men for their own singlehood. "
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Blame
Men
Own
" Sometime between when the Summer of Love ended and the Summer of Sam began, America became a nation of cynics about love. "
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Summer
America
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" Though it's safe to say there are a whole lotta American gals who agree with the core ideals of feminism, they are somehow nevertheless watching 'Say Yes to the Dress' by the millions. "
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" People who find that they have a lot of drama in their relationships need to allow themselves to get 'bored'. At first, it will feel excruciating, and they may find themselves confronting a very real fear underneath all that drama: being truly close and therefore vulnerable to another human being. "
Tracy McMillan
Feel
People
Drama
" If you're not married, chances are you think a lot about you. "
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You
Chances
Lot
" Ask anyone who has been in a love relationship for a while: nothing is perfect. "
Tracy McMillan
Perfect
Love
Relationship
" Here's the thing: you're not really ready for love until you have enough self-respect that if you met your exact self, but in a guy, you would totally, completely, absolutely want to be with him. "
Tracy McMillan
Love
Self
Enough
" I talk to women for a living. It's pretty much what I do with my day. "
Tracy McMillan
Women
Day
Pretty
" The thing is, relationships never work out... until they do. You learn a lot from relationships that don't work out. "
Tracy McMillan
Never
Learn
You
" I think of masculine and feminine energy like two sides to a battery. There's a plus side and a minus side, and in order to make something turn on, you need to have opposites touching. It's the same in relationships. "
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Need
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" I think every woman has this point in her life where she's like, 'I have a great job, great outfits and great friends, but something's missing.' "
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Woman
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" When relationships don't work out, it doesn't mean you're a bad person, it just means you weren't meant to be together. "
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Relationships
Bad
You
" I feel that as long as you're honest, you have the opportunity to grow. It's when you shut down, go into denial, and try to start hiding things from yourself and others, that's when you lock in certain behaviors and attitudes that keep you stuck. "
Tracy McMillan
Opportunity
Yourself
You
" I've been standing at water coolers for the past thirty years talking to women about their love lives, and here's what I've learned: Eventually, most women I know want to be partnered. "
Tracy McMillan
Know
Past
Talking
" If I had an office job, I'd probably be doing the exact same thing I'm doing on television: hanging out by the water cooler and talking to co-workers about their relationships. "
Tracy McMillan
Water
Doing
Television
" Without really trying to, I've become a sort of jailhouse lawyer of relationships - someone who's had to do so much work on her own case that I can now help you with yours. "
Tracy McMillan
You
Help
I Can
" One of the beautiful things about men is that they're very in the moment. That's why they don't want to have an argument about what happened six months ago. "
Tracy McMillan
Beautiful
Moment
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