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" The thing is, relationships never work out... until they do. You learn a lot from relationships that don't work out. "
Tracy McMillan
Never
Learn
You
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" Sometime between when the Summer of Love ended and the Summer of Sam began, America became a nation of cynics about love. "
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" If I had an office job, I'd probably be doing the exact same thing I'm doing on television: hanging out by the water cooler and talking to co-workers about their relationships. "
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" I was, for some reason, born knowing how to get married. "
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" People who find that they have a lot of drama in their relationships need to allow themselves to get 'bored'. At first, it will feel excruciating, and they may find themselves confronting a very real fear underneath all that drama: being truly close and therefore vulnerable to another human being. "
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" All of us, consciously or unconsciously, set out to have the best possible love life. Valentine's Day simply shines a light on the degree to which that didn't - or hasn't yet - materialized. "
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" Yes, I have 'failed' at marriage - a lot. "
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" Somehow, married or single, we'd rather anesthetize ourselves with love substitutes than go for the real thing, because let's face it: The real thing is pretty scary. "
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" Here's the thing: you're not really ready for love until you have enough self-respect that if you met your exact self, but in a guy, you would totally, completely, absolutely want to be with him. "
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" Work is a different type of pursuit than relationships. You can't take the skills that you know that have gotten you into that great school or into that great job and apply them to your relationships. "
Tracy McMillan
School
Know
Job
" Women with low self-esteem love bad boys. Women who have work to do love bad boys. Women who love themselves love good men. "
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Women
Bad
Men
" Because I was a television writer for many years, I write very conversationally. I put things straight, and with a lot of humor. "
Tracy McMillan
Write
Humor
Television
" Women blame men for their own singlehood. "
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Men
Own
" Being in a relationship is a hard, painful slog at least once a week, maybe more often - especially if you have a lot of defenses to let down, or if your parents didn't know how to love you very well. "
Tracy McMillan
Parents
Week
Relationship
" Relationships are like the world's most intense yoga! It's a daily practice. "
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Relationships
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World
" Caring - about people, about things, about life - is an act of maturity. "
Tracy McMillan
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Life
Caring
" When relationships don't work out, it doesn't mean you're a bad person, it just means you weren't meant to be together. "
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Relationships
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" I think of masculine and feminine energy like two sides to a battery. There's a plus side and a minus side, and in order to make something turn on, you need to have opposites touching. It's the same in relationships. "
Tracy McMillan
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You
Think
" Is our desire for partnership just an evolutionary remainder, a Togetherness Delusion, where millions of women only think they need a relationship to be truly happy? Maybe. But you know what? That's fine with me. "
Tracy McMillan
Women
Relationship
Think
" Being all about me is not a good thing - I don't care what 1978 tried to say - because as long as you mostly think about yourself, you're not going to be a wonderful person. You're just not. "
Tracy McMillan
Good
Me
Think
" I'm the straight-talking woman in your life who is going to be really honest with you, but come from a place of love. I'm not talking down to you; I do this from my heart. "
Tracy McMillan
Heart
Woman
You
" I talk to women for a living. It's pretty much what I do with my day. "
Tracy McMillan
Women
Day
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" A sure-fire way to know you're crazy is if more than one person has told you you'd be great on a reality show - and you agree with them. "
Tracy McMillan
You
Person
Reality
" There is no such thing as 'getting' a guy, house and kids. There is only surrendering to them. "
Tracy McMillan
House
Getting
Only
" You can't trick The Universe - it's like Santa Claus that way. "
Tracy McMillan
Santa
You
Trick
" I feel that as long as you're honest, you have the opportunity to grow. It's when you shut down, go into denial, and try to start hiding things from yourself and others, that's when you lock in certain behaviors and attitudes that keep you stuck. "
Tracy McMillan
Opportunity
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You
" Lots of people feel more alive when they're riding a roller-coaster relationship. But while this might be fun for a while, it can't possibly last. "
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Feel
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" If you're not married, chances are you think a lot about you. "
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You
Chances
Lot
" I've been standing at water coolers for the past thirty years talking to women about their love lives, and here's what I've learned: Eventually, most women I know want to be partnered. "
Tracy McMillan
Know
Past
Talking
" Without really trying to, I've become a sort of jailhouse lawyer of relationships - someone who's had to do so much work on her own case that I can now help you with yours. "
Tracy McMillan
You
Help
I Can
" One of the beautiful things about men is that they're very in the moment. That's why they don't want to have an argument about what happened six months ago. "
Tracy McMillan
Beautiful
Moment
Argument