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" Would I like kids? If I knew I could be - and how could I put this delicately - faithful, then yes. I do like kids. "
Simon Cowell
Kids
Faithful
How
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" Anything I shouldn't laugh at makes me laugh. I mean, I'm bad at that, when somebody is singing something terribly and I'm thinking to myself, 'If I laugh now, this is the absolute worst thing I could ever do,' and then I start laughing and I can't stop. "
Simon Cowell
Singing
Thinking
Laugh
" I didn't have any qualifications when I left school - I had three O-levels. "
Simon Cowell
School
Three
Left
" At 20, you're cocky and you think you can rule the world, and you get it all wrong. "
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You
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" I do a couple of hundred press-ups a day but I haven't been to a gym in years. "
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Couple
Day
Gym
" If I went to a psychiatrist, it would be a long session. I've always thought that I do have a number of issues that probably need dealing with, because I am quite odd in some ways. "
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Need
Odd
I Am
" There was nothing I could - and wanted to - learn in school. It was just a complete waste of my time. "
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Nothing
School
Time
" If I go into a relationship with an artist, which at most is going to last five years, we have a 100-page contract covering every eventuality. Whereas with marriage you go into it with no contract, with laws that date back hundreds of years, and I don't think that's right. "
Simon Cowell
Relationship
Back
Marriage
" I was never given any hand-outs. I started at the bottom and was very good at finding people who knew more than me and learning from them. "
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Learning
Good
Finding
" The secret of my success is that I make other people money. And, never ever, ever, ever be ashamed about trying to earn as much as possible for yourself, if the person you're working with is also making money. That's life! "
Simon Cowell
Success
Life
Money
" I am quite miserable because I'm never satisfied with what I've got. You're always looking for that next high, and that is what I would define as happiness. "
Simon Cowell
I Am
You
Looking
" You don't go into anything contemplating failure, because if you did, you wouldn't make it. "
Simon Cowell
Did
Failure
Because
" It's not my habit to kiss and tell. I've never done it. "
Simon Cowell
Never
Tell
Habit
" The object of this competition is not to be mean to the losers but to find a winner. The process makes you mean because you get frustrated. "
Simon Cowell
You
Competition
Find
" I met someone the other night who's 28 years old, and he hasn't worked a day since he left college because he's pursuing a dream he'll never, ever realize: He thinks he's a great singer. Actually, he's crap. "
Simon Cowell
Day
Dream
Great
" Rules equal boredom, and I don't like that. "
Simon Cowell
Boredom
Like
Rules
" I still put punctuation in my texts. If it's an 'I', I make sure it's a capital. "
Simon Cowell
Still
Punctuation
Make
" There's no need for me to get married. I live with someone; we're happy; end of story. "
Simon Cowell
Need
Story
Me
" I like to know why a video has suddenly gone viral, why a song has broken, why a TV show is suddenly rating out of pattern... I'm pretty good at understanding why things are becoming popular. "
Simon Cowell
Understanding
Good
Broken
" When you're making a reality show, you can't even plan a week ahead now. "
Simon Cowell
You
Now
Reality
" My own saying is: 'Create the hype, but don't ever believe it.' "
Simon Cowell
Saying
Own
My Own
" I turned down many chances to be on TV before 'Pop Idol' because I really wasn't interested in being famous. I didn't need it and didn't want it. "
Simon Cowell
Famous
Being Famous
Down
" Have I got a black book? Yes, it's called a mobile phone. I do get offers. There is no shortage of people if you want to go on dates - working in TV, living in L.A., it is there if you want it. "
Simon Cowell
Phone
Living
Book
" I hated school, but I love work. "
Simon Cowell
Hated
I Love
Love
" I don't mind being cast as some kind of a pantomime baddie, but I am very fair in business. I always have been. I pride myself on being fair. "
Simon Cowell
Pride
Business
I Am
" I want people to understand that from the minute Lady Gaga arrived, she created a new set of rules: being different is good; embrace it. "
Simon Cowell
Being Different
People
Good
" No one really has any job security anymore, including myself. "
Simon Cowell
Anymore
Myself
Security
" My proudest achievement has been the success of the shows and artists I have been involved with, because they were made in Britain. "
Simon Cowell
Achievement
Because
Involved
" I hate belongings. I hate clutter. It really bothers me because I can't think properly. If you've got distractions in front of you, your mind goes nuts. "
Simon Cowell
Mind
Me
You
" I'm not sure who has the right to say that you have better taste than somebody else, because essentially what you're doing is calling millions of people morons. "
Simon Cowell
People
Right
You
" I've spent hundreds of thousands of pounds on the very best security and I can assure you my homes are as safe as the Bank of England. "
Simon Cowell
Security
Safe
You