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" A puppy plays with every pup he meets, but an old dog has few associates. "

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" In youth we run into difficulties. In old age difficulties run into us. "

" Men mourn for what they have lost; women for what they ain't got. "

" There are people who are always anticipating trouble, and in this way they manage to enjoy many sorrows that never really happen to them. "

" Reason often makes mistakes, but conscience never does. "

" Wisdom has never made a bigot, but learning has. "

" Don't ever prophesy; for if you prophesy wrong, nobody will forget it; and if you prophesy right, nobody will remember it. "

" If you ever find happiness by hunting for it, you will find it, as the old woman did her lost spectacles, safe on her own nose all the time. "

" Laughter is the sensation of feeling good all over and showing it principally in one place. "

" I think when the full horror of being fifty hits you, you should stay home and have a good cry. "

" You’d better not know so much, than to know so many things that ain’t so. "

" The best way to convince a fool that he is wrong is to let him have his own way. "

" There's a great power in words, if you don't hitch too many of them together. "

" As a general thing, when a woman wears the pants in a family, she has a good right to them. "

" It is much easier to repent of sins that we have committed than to repent of those that we intend to commit. "

" The best time for you to hold your tongue is the time you feel you must say something or bust. "

" The thinner the ice, the more anxious is everyone to see whether it will bear. "

" Most people repent their sins by thanking God they ain't so wicked as their neighbors. "

" Love looks through a telescope; envy, through a microscope. "

" As scarce as truth is, the supply has always been in excess of the demand. "

" The trouble with people is not that they don't know but that they know so much that ain't so. "

" Time is like money, the less we have of it to spare the further we make it go. "

" Old maids sweeten their tea with scandal. "

" Knowledge is like money: the more he gets, the more he craves. "

" A good way I know to find happiness, is to not bore a hole to fit the plug. "

" Common sense is instinct, and enough of it is genius. "

" Woman's influence is powerful, especially when she wants something. "

" Economy is a savings-bank, into which men drop pennies, and get dollars in return. "

" Honesty is the rarest wealth anyone can possess, and yet all the honesty in the world ain't lawful tender for a loaf of bread. "

" It ain't often that a man's reputation outlasts his money. "

" A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself. "