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" You’d better not know so much, than to know so many things that ain’t so. "

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" There are lots of people who mistake their imagination for their memory. "

" Time is like money, the less we have of it to spare the further we make it go. "

" There are some people so addicted to exaggeration that they can't tell the truth without lying. "

" About the only difference between the poor and the rich, is this, the poor suffer misery, while the rich have to enjoy it. "

" I have never known a person to live to be one hundred and be remarkable for anything else. "

" Woman's influence is powerful, especially when she wants something. "

" When a man comes to me for advice, I find out the kind of advice he wants, and I give it to him. "

" Men mourn for what they have lost; women for what they ain't got. "

" In youth we run into difficulties. In old age difficulties run into us. "

" Reason often makes mistakes, but conscience never does. "

" Confess your sins to the Lord and you will be forgiven; confess them to man and you will be laughed at. "

" Advice is like castor oil, easy enough to give but dreadful uneasy to take. "

" Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing those you hold well. "

" Genius ain't anything more than elegant common sense. "

" Silence is one of the hardest arguments to refute. "

" No one can disgrace us but ourselves. "

" Threescore years and ten is enough; if a man can't suffer all the misery he wants in that time, he must be numb. "

" It's not only the most difficult thing to know one's self, but the most inconvenient. "

" If you ever find happiness by hunting for it, you will find it, as the old woman did her lost spectacles, safe on her own nose all the time. "

" It is much easier to repent of sins that we have committed than to repent of those that we intend to commit. "

" Remember the poor, it costs nothing. "

" Marrying for love may be a bit risky, but it is so honest that God can't help but smile on it. "

" Knowledge is like money: the more he gets, the more he craves. "

" There's a great power in words, if you don't hitch too many of them together. "

" Money will buy a pretty good dog, but it won't buy the wag of his tail. "

" As scarce as truth is, the supply has always been in excess of the demand. "

" The wheel that squeaks the loudest is the one that gets the grease. "

" Laughter is the sensation of feeling good all over and showing it principally in one place. "

" The trouble with people is not that they don't know but that they know so much that ain't so. "

" It is not all bad, this getting old, ripening. After the fruit has got its growth it should juice up and mellow. God forbid I should live long enough to ferment and rot and fall to the ground in a squash. "