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" Basically I try not to knock other comedians. "
Robert Webb
Comedians
Knock
Try
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" It was quite an honour when 'New Woman' magazine voted me 88th sexiest man in the world. I think I was one in front of David Cameron. "
Robert Webb
Woman
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Me
" If I hadn't got into comedy, I wouldn't have met Abbey, my wife, and I wouldn't have my two girls, and the whole thing unravels. That's the thing about being basically - whisper it quietly - happy, is that you don't really want to change anything, because once you start changing stuff, then what you've got all disappears. "
Robert Webb
You
Change
Comedy
" We have a family holiday once a year, usually abroad, but that's it. I feel I should have holidays for my family's sake, but I'm not that adventurous. "
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Feel
Holiday
Holidays
" I don't do much lying in real life because I don't get away with it. "
Robert Webb
Real Life
Life
Lying
" Mum was an amazing parent and my best pal. The tragedy of it, really, was that she died from breast cancer just as I was becoming a man, aged 17, and we were just starting to speak as adults. She was snatched away, and it felt cruel. She made me laugh. "
Robert Webb
Breast Cancer
Amazing
Best
" It's odd because some actors are very scared of comedians. "
Robert Webb
Some
Scared
Odd
" I am a feminist. I don't especially care for the term, but there it is. "
Robert Webb
I Am
Term
Feminist
" I proposed to my wife on Brighton Beach, and she said yes. That's pretty romantic. Even though I forgot to go down on one knee because I was too busy trying to compose the question. "
Robert Webb
Trying
Romantic
Busy
" When I was 18, I was halfway up the Eiffel Tower with my friend, Tom, when we decided to stick our heads through the railings. The gap between the railings was exactly the right size to be able to put your head through and nearly get stuck. Which is exactly what happened. "
Robert Webb
Up
Right
Head
" Ed Miliband is obviously a mild guy. I don't expect him to pretend to be a pugilist. "
Robert Webb
Obviously
Expect
Pretend
" Car-essential is a real turn-off to me, so yeah, I just want a friendly holiday resort with a villa and a pool, but which is really private, but there again, there's a supermarket and a doctor's and a beach a five-minute walk away. That's all I want, and it's quite difficult to find. "
Robert Webb
Walk
Beach
Doctor
" I grew up watching British comedy on TV, really. "
Robert Webb
Comedy
Up
Watching
" Slow, skinny, and an utter countryside coward: I lived in dread of nettles, spiders, and the very sound of a wasp. As a victim, I was beneath the dignity of the bullies in my year but fair game to the ones in the year below. "
Robert Webb
Game
Dignity
Coward
" One thing about the fantasy dinner party idea that no one considers is whether these people are going to get on. I would say John McEnroe and Ian McEwan, but what would they have to say to each other? "
Robert Webb
People
Dinner
Fantasy
" I'm knackered. I'm knackered all the time. My stupid, tiny children wake me up at 5:48 A.M. every single morning. "
Robert Webb
Up
Children
Me
" We got our revolution out of the way long before the French and the Americans. The monarchy was restored, but the sovereignty of our parliament, made up of and elected by a slowly widening constituency of the people, has never been seriously challenged since then. "
Robert Webb
Revolution
People
Long
" Ukippers are the kinds of fools who haven't noticed they're sleep-walking towards fascism. Many UKIP candidates are of the age when their parents fought in the Second World War. "
Robert Webb
Fascism
Parents
Age
" I think of myself as naturally idle. The trouble is, the 'nothing' that I do every day is not really nothing. I potter. I muck about with emails, I make coffee, I fiddle with my computer to make sure that the book I haven't started writing is perfectly synced across all platforms and devices. "
Robert Webb
Day
Myself
Writing
" No, feminism isn't 'over.' We need it not only to challenge injustice but because the whole gender expectations thing is bad for men, too. "
Robert Webb
Men
Bad
Challenge
" Very bad things follow when we kid ourselves that we're naturally rational, rather than the more humbling truth: naturally emotional. "
Robert Webb
More
Bad
Emotional
" When I was 15, if Stephen Fry had advised me to trim my eyebrows with a Flymo, I would have given it serious consideration. "
Robert Webb
Eyebrows
Me
Serious
" I snootily say I can't take too many dramatic parts, as it's taking work from actors who aren't funny. "
Robert Webb
Take
Say
Funny
" I can't imagine getting bored with comedy or thinking comedy is beneath us suddenly. "
Robert Webb
Imagine
Us
Thinking
" I think jokes can actually go to places that drama can't. "
Robert Webb
Jokes
I Think
Drama
" Don't get me wrong - intellectual snobbery is vulgar and gauche. "
Robert Webb
Intellectual
Wrong
Vulgar
" When I look in the mirror, I see the ageing process at full pelt, the hairline in retreat, the bags under the eyes growing and darkening, that kind of thing. I suppose it would be easier if I weren't an actor, but I am fairly philosophical about it. "
Robert Webb
Kind
Mirror
Process
" My first proper kiss was from Cara Shucksmith when I was 13 or 14 at her birthday party. "
Robert Webb
Kiss
Her
Birthday
" My childhood was as heavily gendered as any you would find in a working-class household in Lincolnshire. "
Robert Webb
Working-Class
Childhood
Any
" I've been called funny. I assume my wife thinks I'm funny. But generally, if you bumped into me and said hello, I would say hello back, politely. And that would be it. "
Robert Webb
Funny
You
Say
" My mother died when I was 17, and I moved in with my dad to make a 12-month pig's ear of retaking my A-levels. "
Robert Webb
Make
Pig
Dad