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" I don't want any vegetables, thank you. I paid for the cow to eat them for me. "

Douglas Coupland

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" I always thought of words as art supplies. "

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" We're rapidly approaching a world comprised entirely of jail and shopping. "

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" Clowns drink to blot out the ravages of terrifying children for a living. "

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" Money isn't money anymore. Time doesn't feel like time anymore. Your sense of community, it's evaporated, too, or it's turned into something you visit at 2 A.M. on a website. "

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" If you're not a tree hugger, then you're a what, a tree hater? "

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" I don't think I see the world in terms of stupid or clever, but in terms of being able to get irony. There's some awful statistic about only 20 per cent of Americans being able to understand irony. "

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" Brain research tells us that only twenty percent of human beings have a sense of irony, which means that eighty percent of the world takes everything at face value. "

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" My father has never once asked me a question, any question. There's a freedom that came from that. It allowed me to create my own way of thinking. "

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" The capacity for not feeling lonely can carry a very real price, that of feeling nothing at all. "

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" Everybody has basically the same family, it's just reconfigured slightly differently from one to the next. "

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" I've always felt like an alien trapped in a human form. We all do at some time or other; for me it's a permanent state, and I'm still unsure if Earth is a penance or a reward. "

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" People say if you're doing an art project, that's different from a book, but I honestly don't see it. I try and try, and I just don't. "

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" Big companies are like marching bands. Even if half the band is playing random notes, it still sounds kind of like music. The concealment of failure is built into them. "

Douglas Coupland

" The harder you try to become the opposite of your parents, the more quickly you become them. "

Douglas Coupland

" If human beings had genuine courage, they'd wear their costumes every day of the year, not just on Halloween. "

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" In a faraway land called 'pre-2000,' what Earthlings now call blogging was called 'keeping a diary.' It's hard work to do well. I tried doing it in the early 1990s but had to stop because I no longer had a life - instead I had this thing that generated anecdotes to go into my diary. The diary took over and I had to stop. "

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" I get verklempt if I see a vintage TI-30 or TI-54 calculator. But I don't think I'd want to use one. "

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" Cellphones have, if nothing else, turned TV crime writers into lazy sloths. "

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" Headwise, I always kind of knew that everyone goes grey in our family very early - and I was like, it works for me. I started growing my beard, and it changes the shape of your skull and your face, and I started seeing my mother's side of the family in myself for the first time. "

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" I've always thought that you live in the present, you live in a specific present. You are writing, present tense, so write in the present as it is. "

Douglas Coupland

" The 1990s felt like the 1990s in a real and good way. "

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" The whole point of Gen X was, and continues to be, a negation of being forced into Baby Boomerdom against one's will. "

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" I was at Emily Carr College of Art and Design in Vancouver for four years, and I loved it. "

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" The reason the future feels odd is because of its unpredictability. If the future didn't feel weirdly unexpected, then something would be wrong. "

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" God is what keeps us together after the love is gone. "

Douglas Coupland

" One of the cruelest things you can do to another person is pretend you care about them more than you really do. "

Douglas Coupland

" It's fun to sentimentalize the 20th-century lifestyle and the 20th-century brain, but it helps nobody, it makes you look ancient, there's no going back, and you'd be miserable if you did. "

Douglas Coupland

" You're smarter than TV. So what? "

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" Sometimes I wonder if the world is too interesting and too boring at the same time. "

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