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" I find it easier to abstain than do a little bit of anything. I'm not a 'little bit' kind of dame. I want it all, whatever I do. "

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" I compare Stephen Sondheim with humor, because humor is unanalyzable. You can't analyze humor. You just have to get through it. "

" I mention I'm going home, and I'm a star immediately! This used to happen with my boyfriends - as soon as I'd say, 'I gotta go home now,' they fell in love. "

" Dying is easy. Comedy is hard. "

" I love New York. I went to New York to become an actress, and I did it. And I won all the awards known to man. And I'm happy. And I came home. I came, I saw, I conquered. And it feels great. "

" I always say, 'If you can't give a reason for the banana peel being in the alley, then don't have the comic slide over it.' Do you understand what I mean? First explain how the banana peel got there quickly. And then there's a reason for all the comedy. "

" I'm a good acting partner for me... when I don't have anyone else, I do really well! "

" There's certainly nothing lasting and definite about the theater. "

" I like being talked about. I think some people really don't... because they're secure enough and they don't need that. "

" New Yorkers stop me on the street all the time to say, 'You're terrific! You're the nuts!' "

" I think being boring is just the worst sin of all time. "

" I never thought about living in New York. I just thought it was great. "

" I'm a hotel baby, absolutely: it's hard to think of a hotel I haven't stayed in. "

" Making clever speeches takes a lot of work and a lot of time. "

" I smoked, I drank, I did all the kicking my heels up type things, but I went to Mass on Sunday. "

" Certain type of actresses get younger instead of older. I always say, 'Only ingenues age.' "

" I just serve others through entertaining. That's when I am happy. "

" I think it's the wrong way around to say, 'When you get older move to the country.' I think when you get older you move to New York. "

" I have no intention of retiring. Even my blood sugar is better when I'm working. "

" Fans recognize me all over the place. But the second you need anything, they're never around! They're like the police! "

" I don't think there's any thrill in the world like doing work you're good at. "

" Let me tell you about those convents. All that crap about extending the pinkie finger while sipping tea is a myth. Convent schools are breeding grounds for great broads and occasionally one-of-the-boys. Convent schools teach you to play against everything, which is what I'm still doing. "

" When the hospital sends for me, when the ambulance comes and I ease my way out of the world, I'd rather be in Detroit, Michigan, than Lenox Hill. "

" I do believe in the infallibility of the Pope, because I think we have to believe in something. "

" Talent is seductive. "

" My movie career - if such a thing even exists - is laughable. "

" For me, going to London is like coming home. In fact, I've often entertained the idea of ending my days there. "

" I never found anyone who could look after me as well as I could look after myself. "

" There's something about it that makes sense, Lent. You give something up, and everything's more joyful. "

" I could have made a lot of money doing 'Golden Girls,' and I would have been good. But the image of it! And for me to work with Betty White every day would be like taking cyanide. "

" Why haven't I made more movies? Nobody asked me. "