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" I never found anyone who could look after me as well as I could look after myself. "

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" I'm a good acting partner for me... when I don't have anyone else, I do really well! "

" What I want to understand is what I am talking about on the stage. What I don't want to understand is what the government is talking about when the government tells me about taxes. "

" I care about money, very much. I want it. I don't ever want to be without it. My mother once said about me, 'Elaine has to have money.' "

" I am not influenced by other human beings. But I am inspired. "

" I don't wear a wig. I'd feel terrible onstage with a wig. I hate to be so 'Actors Studio'-ish, but I like to feel it's me out there. "

" I'm funny when I want to be. And I'm even funny when I don't want to be. "

" There's something about it that makes sense, Lent. You give something up, and everything's more joyful. "

" Let me tell you about those convents. All that crap about extending the pinkie finger while sipping tea is a myth. Convent schools are breeding grounds for great broads and occasionally one-of-the-boys. Convent schools teach you to play against everything, which is what I'm still doing. "

" Talent is seductive. "

" Certain type of actresses get younger instead of older. I always say, 'Only ingenues age.' "

" I tell the truth, and it has gotten me into a lot of trouble. My dad used to say to me, 'If you tell the truth all day long, you will end up in jail.' "

" All of the writing on '30 Rock' is a joy to go into. It's pretty hot stuff. "

" I have not had any of that surgical stuff. I am too curious to find out exactly how I progress every day of my life naturally. That is what fascinates me. "

" Making clever speeches takes a lot of work and a lot of time. "

" Betty White is probably a very nice woman. "

" I compare Stephen Sondheim with humor, because humor is unanalyzable. You can't analyze humor. You just have to get through it. "

" I love New York. I went to New York to become an actress, and I did it. And I won all the awards known to man. And I'm happy. And I came home. I came, I saw, I conquered. And it feels great. "

" I love Birmingham, Michigan. It's lovely - you know, it's very similar to the Hamptons. "

" I don't have a great talent for explaining myself in acting because I can't explain it. "

" When I want to do something badly enough, I do it, but there is a practical side of me that thinks I should be paid fairly. "

" I like glasses so I can go out without my makeup. Just grab your coat and get your hat and go. "

" Audiences are not strangers to me. They're the best friends I've got in my life. "

" My biggest dream was to get out of Michigan - to discover life beyond the Sacred Heart Convent. "

" As a diabetic, I'm a walking picnic. I have to eat measured amounts of food at certain times. "

" You never know what is happening to yourself when it is happening. "

" When the hospital sends for me, when the ambulance comes and I ease my way out of the world, I'd rather be in Detroit, Michigan, than Lenox Hill. "

" I don't think I'm gonna die tomorrow or even two weeks from now, or even ever. I just don't know - who the hell knows what's gonna happen to them? Nobody! Isn't that comforting? Nobody has a clue. I like that we don't know. And I like that it's somebody else's decision, not mine. "

" I can't explain chemistry. I really can't. I haven't got a clue what it's all about. It just happens. It's like falling in love. You can't explain why you fall in love or explain why it's this particular person. "

" If I see a great performance on television, onstage, in the movies, I go to work the next day with a renewed energy and less fear. These great artists take me out of my life and make me want to go there. "

" I don't want to see my family all the time, and they're delighted, I'm sure, to be aware of that. "