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" Fans recognize me all over the place. But the second you need anything, they're never around! They're like the police! "

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" I like glasses so I can go out without my makeup. Just grab your coat and get your hat and go. "

" My idea of serenity - that wonderful word that everybody's trying to get into their life - is call-waiting. "

" There are a lot of things I do that I don't want to, but I have to. It's truly an emotional need for me to perform. "

" There's something about it that makes sense, Lent. You give something up, and everything's more joyful. "

" I smoked, I drank, I did all the kicking my heels up type things, but I went to Mass on Sunday. "

" I have no intention of retiring. Even my blood sugar is better when I'm working. "

" When I want to do something badly enough, I do it, but there is a practical side of me that thinks I should be paid fairly. "

" If I see a great performance on television, onstage, in the movies, I go to work the next day with a renewed energy and less fear. These great artists take me out of my life and make me want to go there. "

" New Yorkers stop me on the street all the time to say, 'You're terrific! You're the nuts!' "

" I think being boring is just the worst sin of all time. "

" I don't think there's any thrill in the world like doing work you're good at. "

" These performers that go on about their technique and craft - oh, puleeze! How boring! I don't know what 'technique' means. But I do know what experience is. "

" The people in New York - their humor is on a level that goes, uh, very deep, you know? "

" There were a lot of lyrics that I sang but didn't understand. But I had this facade in performance of looking like I wrote the book. "

" I find it easier to abstain than do a little bit of anything. I'm not a 'little bit' kind of dame. I want it all, whatever I do. "

" I am not influenced by other human beings. But I am inspired. "

" I could have made a lot of money doing 'Golden Girls,' and I would have been good. But the image of it! And for me to work with Betty White every day would be like taking cyanide. "

" I love reviews. Anybody who tells you they don't read reviews is a liar. "

" Betty White is probably a very nice woman. "

" Audiences are not strangers to me. They're the best friends I've got in my life. "

" I think taking care of yourself, health-wise, in every way, is a 100 percent winner. "

" All you have to do is say, 'I'm going home,' and you're the most popular girl at the party. "

" This age thing is all up to you. It's like happiness is up to you. You just have to understand what it is before you get it. "

" I just serve others through entertaining. That's when I am happy. "

" I tell the truth, and it has gotten me into a lot of trouble. My dad used to say to me, 'If you tell the truth all day long, you will end up in jail.' "

" I'm loaded with talent. "

" My movie career - if such a thing even exists - is laughable. "

" Dying is easy. Comedy is hard. "

" If I see someone saying the rosary in the wings, I know they've got talent. "

" I'm a hotel baby, absolutely: it's hard to think of a hotel I haven't stayed in. "