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" Why haven't I made more movies? Nobody asked me. "

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" I love audiences. My God, the best friends in the world! "

" I am not influenced by other human beings. But I am inspired. "

" I'm loaded with talent. "

" I care about money, very much. I want it. I don't ever want to be without it. My mother once said about me, 'Elaine has to have money.' "

" I don't want to see my family all the time, and they're delighted, I'm sure, to be aware of that. "

" Quite frankly I don't know how to be happy. I have not a clue. "

" You never know what is happening to yourself when it is happening. "

" There's something that really frightens me - and that's fear. "

" I have no intention of retiring. Even my blood sugar is better when I'm working. "

" I don't think there's any thrill in the world like doing work you're good at. "

" I think taking care of yourself, health-wise, in every way, is a 100 percent winner. "

" My idea of serenity - that wonderful word that everybody's trying to get into their life - is call-waiting. "

" I never found anyone who could look after me as well as I could look after myself. "

" As a diabetic, I'm a walking picnic. I have to eat measured amounts of food at certain times. "

" I love holidays in New York. I love 'em. I want to celebrate something all the time, and New York has holidays for every day of the week, practically. I like holidays in New York City. "

" All of the writing on '30 Rock' is a joy to go into. It's pretty hot stuff. "

" Fear is the base of what everybody does wrong in their lives. "

" Certain type of actresses get younger instead of older. I always say, 'Only ingenues age.' "

" All you have to do is say, 'I'm going home,' and you're the most popular girl at the party. "

" I tell the truth, and it has gotten me into a lot of trouble. My dad used to say to me, 'If you tell the truth all day long, you will end up in jail.' "

" There's something about it that makes sense, Lent. You give something up, and everything's more joyful. "

" There are a lot of things I do that I don't want to, but I have to. It's truly an emotional need for me to perform. "

" This age thing is all up to you. It's like happiness is up to you. You just have to understand what it is before you get it. "

" I like celebrities. I love people who are famous. Always have. "

" Dying is easy. Comedy is hard. "

" Betty White is probably a very nice woman. "

" My movie career - if such a thing even exists - is laughable. "

" When I'm playing comedy, it is such a crap shoot of what will work and what won't. "

" You have to be very, very good looking to get ahead in motion pictures. "

" I smoked, I drank, I did all the kicking my heels up type things, but I went to Mass on Sunday. "