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" Let's be honest here: Twitter, for me, is 90 per cent a marketing tool. "

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" I'm a fang-toothed, blob-nosed, slouchy slob. "

" A couple of people I knew went to university apart from me, but all the way through I was the smartest kid in the school. That's luck, but I was proud of it. And I was also proud of doing well without trying. As you get older, and it took me a long time to realise it, that's a disgusting attitude, revolting. "

" I'm a scientist at heart, so I know how important the truth is. However inconvenient, however unattractive, however embarrassing, however shocking, the truth is the truth, and wanting it not to be true doesn't change things. "

" I've got re-addicted to normal people, which is the loveliest thing to write about. "

" Ego is hilarious - especially the vanity of a comedian. As soon as you see one start worrying about how cool he is or about how many stadiums he can fill, he stops being funny. "

" I've been lucky enough to be able to choose exactly where I want to live. "

" I love 'The Godfather' and 'Casablanca' - great stories, acted well, made well. "

" When I see a headline 'Guess who's going out with who?' I don't guess, and I don't click. "

" All of my friends are oddities. "

" Luckily, even when people are shouting lies, the truth is undamaged. Science doesn't matter what you believe. "

" Look, just tell me where that lemon came from and I'll shut up and go away. "

" I think our elderly are forgotten sometimes. "

" The only thing that really depresses me is animal cruelty. "

" You can laugh at anything. It depends on the joke. "

" I always do a little bit of improv. I did some of 'The Office,' a tiny bit in 'Extras,' a bit more in 'Derek.' "

" I think it's important to hold a mirror up to society and yourself. "

" Stephen Merchant looks like a Muppet. I mean, he looks like Beaker. "

" Making people laugh is easy for me. I'm quite proud of that. But I'm prouder of silencing an audience for a minute because they're thinking about something. "

" Why buy a book when you can join a library. "

" With the Internet era and social media and politics being so out there with the lies, now you've got people denying things they're on camera doing, and then you've got people not really caring about the truth. You've got people supporting people who've done horrific things, but just don't want the other side to get any satisfaction. "

" When I go to work, I don't want to make depressing, gritty, urban stories that are depressing to watch. I want to give people something to enjoy. When people think I'm a control freak and an ogre - which I am - it's only because I want my work to be accessible and Everyman, in a way. "

" I don't mind what people say about me as long as it's an opinion or the truth. If someone says, 'He's the worst comedian in the world,' that's fine. If someone says, 'His face makes me want to punch the TV,' that's fine. But if they say, 'Oh, and I know for a fact he hunts squirrels,' I go: no, no, no... that's a lie. "

" When I was about to be famous, I feared it on a few levels. I feared it because I didn't want people to lump me in with those people who'd do anything to be famous. I didn't like the word 'celebrity.' I feared intrusion, you know? Make me famous, and suddenly you can go through my trash bins. "

" I didn't like noisy cinemas when I wasn't famous. "

" Honor is a gift a man gives himself. You can be as good as anyone that ever lived. If you can read, you can learn everything that anyone ever learned. But you've got to want it. "

" Stupidity without malice isn't horrible; some people can't help it. "

" I think Spielberg is a master. I think 'Jaws' invented a genre. "

" You should make something. You should bring something into the world that wasn't in the world before. It doesn't matter what it is. It doesn't matter if it's a table or a film or gardening-everyone should create. You should do something, then sit back and say, 'I did that.' "

" I think Dustin Hoffman has been in at least three of my favorite movies of all time with things like 'Tootsie,' 'Marathon Man.' Getting a bit more arthouse and darker, 'The Graduate' - incredible, barrier-breaking movie, 'The Graduate.' "

" I think all art - even one as lowly as making jokes about celebrities - is there to make a connection. "