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" Sometimes, I hate-watch television. "
Emily V. Gordon
Sometimes
Television
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" I think it's always good to get into your partner's mindset. "
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" Keeping physical items from the past is important - we keep old toys, grandparents' jewelry, yearbooks, dance recital programs - and we assign meaning to them. Those items become the memories, and that's a very healthy thing to do. The problems occur when we have too many of those sentimental items, and they start weighing us down. "
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" I am fairly convinced that people plan destination weddings because they would actually like to elope but want to have given you the option to attend. "
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" Marriage isn't just about two people who fit together well. It's about two people who figure out how to fit together well. "
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" There is no level of professional rejection that can compare to almost dying. "
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" Not deciding is a decision. People don't realize that not making a decision is a decision in itself. "
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" Post-divorce, the world can feel harsh and full of jagged edges. "
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" Hindsight is always 20/20, but I imagine a lot of married and divorced people have insights to share about how they felt during their engagement. "
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" I think it's lovely when people are more involved in local politics. "
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Politics
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" Sometimes we are much better at judging people based on how they treat everyone other than ourselves. We make a million excuses for why they treat us how they do. "
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People
Excuses
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" Marriage is not a magical potion that serves to amplify adoration, reduce deep-seated feelings of resentment, erase fears of commitment, or answer questions about whether or not this is the right move. Marriage is a ceremony that cements your current bond to another human being, and while that's a huge thing, that's all it does. "
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Bond
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" In some cases, newlyweds want so badly for things to be perfect that they ignore warning signs, both in themselves and each other. "
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Warning
Ignore
" I don't remember being put into the coma, but I do have a lot of weird memories from being under. This may be because I was in a coma via medicine rather than trauma. That time period played out for me as one long rambling dream where I was at a hospital to visit my boyfriend, who I thought was in an accident. "
Emily V. Gordon
Medicine
Time
Thought
" Unequivocally, individual human beings who live together will always have different standards of what a 'clean house' looks like. "
Emily V. Gordon
Live
Always
Looks
" Marriage will not change your spouse. It will not make him or her more mature, more loyal to you, or better at housework. "
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Change
You
Marriage
" Parents go to sleep early. This is universal. "
Emily V. Gordon
Sleep
Parents
Universal
" There's nothing like listening to the drone of QVC's always-bubbly pitchwomen, as they try to move loose-fitting tunics with 'just the right amount of sparkle,' to soothe you into a healing slumber. "
Emily V. Gordon
Try
Nothing
Listening
" Experiences don't make us damaged goods; it's what we do with those experiences that matters. "
Emily V. Gordon
Make
Matters
Us
" That's part of what a relationship is: you don't experience things in the same way. "
Emily V. Gordon
Relationship
Experience
Same
" Nothing makes me feel more mushy and full of love for my husband than going back and looking at our flirtation unfolding online. I love reading our old e-mails, texts, and Gchats. "
Emily V. Gordon
Looking
Husband
Old
" After my divorce, I took some time off from having a romantic life to begin the tough work of figuring out where I'd gone wrong and what on Earth I could do to understand how to be a whole person in a relationship. "
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Romantic
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Work
" A lot of people end up getting married more out of expectation than out of passion for each other, but if your options have ever been, 'We either get married or break up,' be careful. Marriage should be a new addition you add to the house that is your relationship, not the structure you impose on the house once it's already built. "
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Marriage
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" As my marriage was slowly dissolving into silent meals and awkward nights of avoiding conversation, I started pondering an unmarried future and wondered if I'd ever be able to hack being single again. "
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Silent
Conversation
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" Women are encouraged to go on an emotional journey of self-care after a divorce, while men are expected to need help learning how to cook and parent on their own. "
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Learning
Women
Own
" It's absolutely amazing to me that anyone allowed their children to watch 'The Ren & Stimpy Show' in the '90s; it's dark, gross, nihilistic, and absolutely bizarre. "
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Dark
" I grew up in a very small town in North Carolina, weird and pudgy, without too many other kids to play with. I spent a lot of time watching TV. It was my reassurance that the outside world was bigger and more colorful than the one I lived in. "
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World
Weird
Time
" Dealing with wedding stuff is a bit of a double-edged sword - it seems that divorcees are expected to either burn it all on the front lawn, tears silently coursing down their faces, or keep the stuff, shrine-like, concealed somewhere in their homes. "
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Down
Wedding
Tears
" Don't expect yourself to immediately love your stepchildren. In fact, you may hate them for a bit. "
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Expect
" I have a pretty intense work ethic. If something's not done, I cannot let go until I get it done. "
Emily V. Gordon
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Get
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