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" I am fairly convinced that people plan destination weddings because they would actually like to elope but want to have given you the option to attend. "

Emily V. Gordon

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" I have multiple tattoos. "

Emily V. Gordon

" I think it's always good to get into your partner's mindset. "

Emily V. Gordon

" 'The Babadook,' written and directed by a woman, is a gorgeously told female-focused story of grief, longing, loneliness, and what mourning can become. "

Emily V. Gordon

" Stays at the in-laws' aren't inherently sexy. "

Emily V. Gordon

" In my experience as a therapist and as a friend, it seems that the majority of the breakup resources available are for women and not men. Women, who tend to be more vocal about their emotional struggles, are the squeaky wheel that gets the grease from friends, from online communities, from books, and from therapeutic approaches. "

Emily V. Gordon

" Women are encouraged to go on an emotional journey of self-care after a divorce, while men are expected to need help learning how to cook and parent on their own. "

Emily V. Gordon

" Sometimes new spouses don't fully process the commitment they've made until after the deal is done, and then they panic. "

Emily V. Gordon

" Cheating is very rarely about the actual act of being with another person. "

Emily V. Gordon

" When we each focus on being the dominant force in our own universe rather than invading other universes, we all win. "

Emily V. Gordon

" Sometimes we put so much effort into things we're doing, like dating or wedding planning, that we don't stop to think about whether or not we even want the results of that effort. "

Emily V. Gordon

" In high school, I decided that all of my female friends were stupid and traded them for guy friends. I loved horror movies and heavy metal and used these interests to become a 'guys' girl.' "

Emily V. Gordon

" A lot of new stepparents fall into the trap of letting children disobey household expectations in order to gain favor with them. "

Emily V. Gordon

" Dealing with wedding stuff is a bit of a double-edged sword - it seems that divorcees are expected to either burn it all on the front lawn, tears silently coursing down their faces, or keep the stuff, shrine-like, concealed somewhere in their homes. "

Emily V. Gordon

" You're not a victim of your divorce. What you decide to do with yourself and your personal life after your marriage ends is your decision, and completely under your control. "

Emily V. Gordon

" I'd watch shows like 'The Kids in the Hall' or 'Twin Peaks,' and I'd see weird people being celebrated and appreciated without compromising their weirdness. On 'The Facts of Life,' I'd see girls who were pudgy, beautiful, popular, tomboyish - many ways of being female - and I'd feel quietly reassured. "

Emily V. Gordon

" Balanced, passionate, grounded people are the ones whose careers are ultimately the most successful. "

Emily V. Gordon

" I haven't always been the best advocate for my own body. I was a too-tall, pudgy child who felt completely out of control of the genetic lottery ticket she'd been given, so in retaliation, I shut down. I ignored my body and hated it for not being tiny and cute like my friends' bodies. "

Emily V. Gordon

" In my professional and personal life, when I meet people who feel broken after a divorce, they can usually be divided into two categories: those who truly believe there's something wrong with them, and those that are using their status as armor. "

Emily V. Gordon

" I definitely think, when you're a teenager, it's more forgiving to talk to strangers and go up to people at a mall or whatever. "

Emily V. Gordon

" If a show is a critical success but a ratings flop, I assume that people are just championing the show because it looks cool to root for an underdog. "

Emily V. Gordon

" In some cases, newlyweds want so badly for things to be perfect that they ignore warning signs, both in themselves and each other. "

Emily V. Gordon

" Things can be tough even when surrounded by nice Pottery Barn stuff. "

Emily V. Gordon

" I always tell people, 'Take a class or volunteer.' It really helps you get out of your own little pocket of people you always see and gets you exposed to a new group of people. "

Emily V. Gordon

" Your wedding day is supposed to be your big day, and yet a lot of engaged couples find that instead of creating an event that will be important to them, they're dodging through a minefield of modern etiquette traps. "

Emily V. Gordon

" There's nothing like listening to the drone of QVC's always-bubbly pitchwomen, as they try to move loose-fitting tunics with 'just the right amount of sparkle,' to soothe you into a healing slumber. "

Emily V. Gordon

" Awkward conversations are painful, but they're way easier than divorce, resentment, and heartbreak. "

Emily V. Gordon

" I grew up in a town where there were no Muslims whatsoever, and there was not a lot of exposure. "

Emily V. Gordon

" When someone insists that you watch a show that's already been on for a few seasons, they're basically saying, 'Hey, you're not doing anything for the next five weeks, are you? Because have I got a plan for you every single night! It's 'Weeds!'' "

Emily V. Gordon

" Hindsight is always 20/20, but I imagine a lot of married and divorced people have insights to share about how they felt during their engagement. "

Emily V. Gordon

" Everybody's got baggage, and not just the classic, 'Oh I have so much baggage,' but everyone comes with so much context, and you're not just dating a person: you're dating all their context, too. Part of relationships is negotiating each other's context. "

Emily V. Gordon