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" There are people out there who will not read books, but somehow they'll read my books. "

Chuck Palahniuk

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" I wouldn't get nearly as many books written if I lived in New York. The Columbia Gorge is fantastic. When the sun shines, I just want to be outdoors. "

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" My books are all fantastically sentimental. "

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" Most novels, I find, are three times longer than they need to be. Very little happens, and I don't want to waste my time with them. "

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" Arguing that God doesn't exist would be like people in the 10th century arguing that germs and microbes didn't exist because they couldn't see them. "

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" I think Chris Brown gets kind of dismissed as a gay writer, and I think Chris's books are really, really smart. I wish his books sold a little more widely. "

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" I think, in a way, I invented the term 'fight club' and that these things have always existed, but they never really had a label. Nobody had a language to apply to them. I created that language in two words and I've been paid a great deal of money for inventing two words and labeling something that has always been around. "

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" Sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken. "

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" To be honest, I hate silence. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" Sometimes you do something, and you get screwed. Sometimes it's the things you don't do, and you get screwed. "

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" To merely observe your culture without contributing to it seems very close to existing as a ghost. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" We don't see a lot of models for male social interaction. There's sports and barn raisings. "

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" I am enormously uncool. I've made a cottage industry of being uncool. And I'm fine with that. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" People have to deal with their issues together; they have to expose themselves and kind of exhaust themselves. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" For me, writing is a kind of coping mechanism. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" I used to work as a volunteer in a hospice, but I don't have any nursing skills or cooking skills or anything, so I was what they call an escort. I would take people to the support groups every night, and I would have to sit sort of on the sidelines so I could take them back to hospice at the end of the meeting. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" When working, my diet degrades to pizza three times a day, because I don't want to distract myself from anything. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" When the 'Fight Club' movie was going into production, I quit my job so I could write full-time. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" I don't do much more than organise other people's ideas and insights and thoughts, and sort of harvest them, and inventory them and present them. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" I haven't shoplifted since I was 13. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" Once I start writing, I can't stop. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" Maybe humans are just the pet alligators that God flushed down the toilet. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" People have to really suffer before they can risk doing what they love. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" Any real belief in death is just wishful thinking. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" We're so much more likely to feel sympathy for an animal than another person; thus, the best fiction uses animals to define truly humane behavior. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" Only through destroying myself can I discover the greater power of my spirit. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" Crap has always happened, crap is happening, and crap will continue to happen. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" The third person allows characters to really attack themselves. We all do this - attack ourselves - every hour of our lives. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" Where would Jesus be if no one had written the gospels? "

Chuck Palahniuk

" In 2008, while the film version of my book 'Choke' was coming to market, my mother was diagnosed with lung cancer. That meant that I had to appear in public to promote a comedy about a son trying to save his dying mother - the plot of Choke - while privately I was caring for my own dying mother. It was torture. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" Being lonely is not a bad thing for a writer. "

Chuck Palahniuk