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" You are not a beautiful, unique snowflake... This is your life, and it's ending one minute at a time. "

Chuck Palahniuk

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" Maybe humans are just the pet alligators that God flushed down the toilet. "

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" I was born in 1962, and it seems that throughout my entire life the world has demanded peace but maintained conflict. "

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" I haven't shoplifted since I was 13. "

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" If you knew that your life was merely a phase or short, short segment of your entire existence, how would you live? Knowing nothing 'real' was at risk, what would you do? You'd live a gigantic, bold, fun, dazzling life. You know you would. That's what the ghosts want us to do - all the exciting things they no longer can. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" My goal is more to be remembered. They'll remember this thing and like it in the future. The trick is to stay remembered long enough for that to happen. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" I know that I'm going to die and that you're going to die. I can't do anything about that. But I can explore it through a metaphor and make a kind of funny, dark story about it, and in doing so, really exhaust and research as many aspects of it as I can imagine. And in a way, that does give me some closure. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" People don't want their lives fixed. Nobody wants their problems solved. Their dramas. Their distractions. Their stories resolved. Their messed cleaned up. Because what would they have left? Just the big scary unknown. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" 'Romance' is based on my entire creative process. I fall in love with an idea, obsess over it, isolate myself with it, and when I eventually introduce it to my friends, they all tell me that it's stupid. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" Arguing that God doesn't exist would be like people in the 10th century arguing that germs and microbes didn't exist because they couldn't see them. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" Mr. Olsen in the fifth grade made me want to be a writer. He said, 'Chuck, you do this really well. And this is much better than setting fires, so keep it up.' That made me a writer. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" If anything I try to write something that would be more difficult to film. I tend to see film as competition and would like instead to do what books do best. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" A short story is something that you can hold in your mind. You can really analyze how the entire thing works, like a machine. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" My way of being with people is probably incredibly unhealthy, in that I'll be incredibly social, and I won't write a word for maybe a year, and I'll just be with people, going to parties and soaking up stories, and just sort of recharging all of my ideas. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" You can tell a more over-the-top incredible story if you use a nonfiction form. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" Everyone smiles with that invisible gun to their head. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" My goal is to create a metaphor that changes our reality by charming people into considering their world in a different way. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" My books are all fantastically sentimental. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" With a book, you're guaranteed the audience has a certain skill level and that the audience has to make an ongoing effort to consume this product and that the project is being consumed by just one person at a time. I really want to play to that strength because it's one of the few advantages books still have. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" I think Chris Brown gets kind of dismissed as a gay writer, and I think Chris's books are really, really smart. I wish his books sold a little more widely. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" The folks who read my books are so passionate about each one of them that the people making my movies are more afraid of my readership than they are of me. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" I wanted to write about the moment when your addictions no longer hide the truth from you. When your whole life breaks down. That's the moment when you have to somehow choose what your life is going to be about. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" I haven't had television since 1991, and it definitely influences me. As a child of the 1970s, I couldn't hold a narrative in my head; I was lucky if I could hold a joke in my head, because every time you turn on television or radio, it wipes the slate clean - at least in my case. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" Game shows are designed to make us feel better about the random, useless facts that are all we have left of our education. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" The unreal is more powerful than the real, because nothing is as perfect as you can imagine it, because it's only intangible ideas, concepts, beliefs, fantasies that last. Stone crumbles, wood rots. People, well, they die. But things as fragile as a thought, a dream, a legend, they can go on and on. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" What is the real purpose behind the Tooth Fairy, the Easter Bunny and Santa Claus? They seem like greater steps toward faith and imagination, each with a payoff. Like cognitive training exercises. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" So much of 'Fight Club' was a rant against fathers. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" When working, my diet degrades to pizza three times a day, because I don't want to distract myself from anything. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" As a lower-class kid, I was raised to think success would be owning stuff. Having that great job, too. Now I find my parents' dream was wrong. You never really own anything. And you're never really finished as a person. "

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" More and more, it feels like I'm doing a really bad impersonation of myself. "

Chuck Palahniuk

" Portland is quickly becoming one of those lovely, lush Third World countries where kinda-rich people retire with their money. "

Chuck Palahniuk