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" You might not be able to stomach it, but as long as you can mind it, your heart will be all right. "

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" I write my own quotes. Except this one. I obviously stole this from somebody really clever. "

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" Some people put up a peace sign with one hand. Some people put up the middle finger instead. I use two hands and put up both. "

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" Individuality or Unity? I say there's room for both. "

" Dear disgruntled artists: the key to success isn't kicking down the door; it's building your own. "

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" Don't hate me 'cause I'm booed a fool! "

" I wonder: when a Jehovah's Witness dies and goes to Heaven, does God hide behind the door and pretend He's not home? "

" Love becomes logically true when lost but still sought from the same source. "

" Just because you're upfront with someone doesn't mean you're an honest person; you might just be someone in the passenger seat. "

" The only way to get under me is to get over yourself. "

" A government full of Democrats would rather have you be a Republican, and a government full of Republicans would rather have you be a Democrat, than have you oppose both. "

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" What's love if not the thing you'll do anything and everything to get back once lost? What's hate if not the thing you'll do anything and everything to get rid of once found? "

" Maybe the best way to get people to be pro-life is to start 'em off in amateur-life. "

" I'll take a redrum with a rellik please. "