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" America's public schools have served their purpose. Free and compulsory education was good for a somewhat unpromising young nation. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Purpose
America
Education
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" Simply because something is a populist movement doesn't make it either good or bad. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Good
Bad
Because
" The divorce rate in 1946 was higher than it ever had been and as high as it ever would be until the '70s. The reason was that prior relationships had not endured the strain of war. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Reason
Divorce
War
" Staying married may have long-term benefits. You can elicit much more sympathy from friends over a bad marriage than you ever can from a good divorce. "
P. J. O'Rourke
You
Good
Sympathy
" The subculture of felons is in great vogue among adolescents. Enron, WorldCom, Tyco, and so forth allow us Republicans to say to America's young people, 'We be thugs.' The GOP may capture the youth vote at last. "
P. J. O'Rourke
People
America
Great
" All business is capitalistic. You require capital for any sort of business endeavour. "
P. J. O'Rourke
You
Capital
Sort
" Californians devised a system of electricity sales that ignored every dimension of the free market. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Electricity
System
Sales
" Modern elites live in bubbles of liberal affluence like Ann Arbor, Brookline, the Upper West Side, Palo Alto, or Chevy Chase. These places used to have impoverished neighborhoods nearby, but the poor people got chased out by young singles living in group homes, hipsters, and urban homesteading gay couples. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Living
Gay
Young
" When the government runs out of lenders, it can do something that households are forbidden to do: print money. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Government
Money
Something
" Being a humorist is not a voluntary thing. You can tell this because in a situation where saying a funny thing will cause a lot of trouble, a humorist will still say the funny thing. No matter how inappropriate. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Situation
Funny
Saying
" The idea of a stag hunt evokes chivalry - knights in jerkins and hose, ladies on sidesaddles with wimples and billowing dresses, a white stag symbolizing something-or-other, and Robin Hood getting in the way. An actual stag hunt is more like a horseback meeting of a county planning commission. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Hood
White
Meeting
" I come from Toledo, Ohio, a town that has been hurt badly by the shift of the automobile business towards Japan. And yet I remember how the car workers lived in the neighborhood that I grew up in. My father was a car salesman, and I remember how we lived. I remember how modestly we lived. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Remember
Car
Business
" We all know the types who listen to Pete Seeger songs; even Pete admits they aren't interesting. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Interesting
Who
Songs
" The First Amendment only says 'Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion.' It can disrespect all it wants. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Law
Religion
Congress
" The 18,000 NASA employees are full of galactic talents and abilities and are ready to accomplish whatever they're directed to do. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Talents
Ready
Employees
" I don't even know which end of a computer one is supposed to gaze into. I've never used a computer. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Even
Gaze
Know
" In Henry Adams, I discovered not only the prototype of the modern thinker but also someone who is more interesting: a viper-toothed, puling, supercilious crank, thwarted in ambition, aging gracelessly, mad at the cosmos, and ashamed of his own jejune ideals. He is nevertheless very dear to me. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Aging
Me
Mad
" The job of the president of the United States is to talk to the public, is to explain to them. Now, some presidents talk too much, like Bill Clinton. Some presidents try to talk but don't know how, like George Bush senior. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Try
Too Much
Job
" Globalization is simply opening the free marketplace to encompass the entire world. "
P. J. O'Rourke
World
Free
Globalization
" Now, do I think the baby boomers tend to be self-absorbed? I do. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Think
Baby Boomers
I Think
" Popular culture has become engorged, broadening and thickening until it's the only culture anyone notices. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Become
Culture
Popular Culture
" They are just really stupid people in Hollywood. You write them a script, and they say they love it, they absolutely love it. Then they say, 'But doesn't it need a small dog, and an Eskimo, and shouldn't it be set in New Guinea?' And you say, 'But it is a sophisticated romantic comedy set in Paris.' "
P. J. O'Rourke
You
Stupid
Romantic
" My ignorance is widespread. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Ignorance
Widespread
" Stupid is a great force in human affairs. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Force
Affairs
Great
" I like to think of my behavior in the sixties as a 'learning experience.' Then again, I like to think of anything stupid I've done as a 'learning experience.' It makes me feel less stupid. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Experience
Think
Stupid
" My wife and I both come from Irish families. There are two kinds of Irish families: the hitting kind and the kidding kind. If you're fortunate - and both of us are - you come from the kidding kind of Irish family. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Two
Family
Irish
" Politics is the one field you don't age out of. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Field
You
Politics
" The Bible is very clear about one thing: Using politics to create fairness is a sin. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Sin
Politics
Fairness
" Distracting a politician from governing is like distracting a bear from eating your baby. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Politician
Bear
Baby
" Supposedly, summer vacation happens because that's when the kids are home from school, although having the kids home from school is no vacation. And supposedly the kids are home from school because of some vestigial throwback to our agricultural past. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Home
Past
Vacation
" As a nation, Kuwait has been, arguably, free of freedom itself. Claimed in turn by Constantinople, Riyadh, and Baghdad, Kuwait has survived by playing Turks off Persians, Arabs off one another, and the English off everyone. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Free
Freedom
Nation