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" Californians devised a system of electricity sales that ignored every dimension of the free market. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Electricity
System
Sales
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" In a free country, government is a dull and onerous responsibility. It is a parent-teacher conference. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Dull
Responsibility
Government
" When you're a war correspondent, the reader is for you because the reader is saying, 'Gee, I wouldn't want to be doing that.' They're on your side. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Saying
Doing
Side
" Politics is the one field you don't age out of. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Field
You
Politics
" Disney's House of the Future had the clean simplicity prized in the 1950s as relief from decades of frayed patchwork, jury-rigging, and make-do clutter caused by Depression and war. "
P. J. O'Rourke
War
Depression
Future
" America is a meritocracy. "
P. J. O'Rourke
America
" Not much was really invented during the Renaissance, if you don't count modern civilization. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Renaissance
You
Modern
" Ideology, politics and journalism, which luxuriate in failure, are impotent in the face of hope and joy. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Joy
Politics
Hope
" Because of their size, parents may be difficult to discipline properly. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Parents
Discipline
Parenting
" A Kindle returns us to the inconvenience of the scroll, except with batteries and electronic glitches. It's as handy as bringing Homer along to recite the 'Iliad' while playing a lyre. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Kindle
Electronic
Us
" Detroit is beautiful - though you probably have to be a child of the industrial Midwest, like me, to see it. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Beautiful
You
See
" I've only been to New Zealand once, about 1989. It was incredibly beautiful, kind of like the ideal of where I live in New England - all that and then some - but I can't say I was there long enough to get any very clear idea. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Kind
Beautiful
Enough
" Once you've built the big machinery of political power, remember you won't always be the one to run it. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Run
You
Remember
" Zero-sum thinking is an obsession of mine, but mostly in economics. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Economics
Mine
Obsession
" The difference between American parties is actually simple. Democrats are in favor of higher taxes to pay for greater spending, while Republicans are in favor of greater spending, for which the taxpayers will pay. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Democrats
American
Difference
" I knew Hunter Thompson since the '70s, and I loved him, but he would wear me out as I got older. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Got
Older
Me
" The C student starts a restaurant. The A student writes restaurant reviews. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Student
Restaurant
Reviews
" To mistrust science and deny the validity of scientific method is to resign your job as a human. You'd better go look for work as a plant or wild animal. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Work
Job
Look
" Some people have facts; these can be proven. Some people have theories; these can be disproven. But people with opinions are mindless and have their minds made up about it. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Minds
Facts
Up
" Maybe the real secret to America's greatness is that we hate one another. "
P. J. O'Rourke
America
Greatness
Secret
" Call a man 'ignorant,' and you have license to show the world your vast fund of knowledge and wise him up. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Wise
World
You
" Democrats hate success. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Democrats
Success
Hate
" New Hampshire polling data are unreliable because, when you call the Granite State's registered Republicans and independents in the middle of dinner and ask them who they're going to vote for, they have a mouth full of mashed potatoes and you can't understand what they say. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Dinner
Say
Data
" After the events of the 20th century, God, quite reasonably, left Europe. But He's still here in the United States. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Left
Here
United States
" The problem in Afghanistan is really not so much land as water. It's a dry country with ample amounts of water running through it, but not to good enough effect. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Country
Problem
Water
" The 1960s was an era of big thoughts. And yet, amazingly, each of these thoughts could fit on a T-shirt. "
P. J. O'Rourke
T-Shirt
Big
Thoughts
" Rahm Emanuel is, we are almost certain, a vampire. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Almost
Certain
Vampire
" The budget doesn't have much control over the government. Then again, the government doesn't have much control over the budget. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Over
Again
Government
" The more aspects of life that can be moved from private reign to public realm, the better it is for politics. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Politics
Public
Better
" The killjoys initiated automobile crash standards so rigorous that we can't buy a car that hasn't been dropped from the top of a phone pole with our whole family strapped inside. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Family
Standards
Top
" Positive rights are the right to shelter, the right to education, the right to health care, the right to a living wage. These things are - these are, I would call them, more properly, political rights rather than positive rights. And they are extremely tricky, because now we are dealing with things that are zero sum. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Positive
Health
Education