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" Some of my best friends are Venture Capitalists, but let's face it, a hamster with Alzheimer's could make those kind of numbers. It's great work if you can get it. "
Scott Adams
Work
Great
You
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" It doesn't take many people to have a bad sense of humor to get in trouble at a corporation. "
Scott Adams
Take
People
Sense Of Humor
" We must develop knowledge optimization initiatives to leverage our key learnings. "
Scott Adams
Our
Key
Knowledge
" Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep. "
Scott Adams
Creativity
Yourself
Art
" Scientists will eventually stop flailing around with solar power and focus their efforts on harnessing the only truly unlimited source of energy on the planet: stupidity. I predict that in the future, scientists will learn how to convert stupidity into clean fuel. "
Scott Adams
Stupidity
Energy
Focus
" The most important thing when you study hypnosis is that you learn that humans are irrational. Until you understand that, hypnosis is hard to do... For me, it was this great awakening to understand that humans are deeply irrational, and it's probably the greatest influence on me in terms of my writing. "
Scott Adams
Writing
Me
You
" I don't get embarrassed by the same things that other people do. I would say that probably the biggest thing that holds people back is, 'If I do this, I'm going to look like an idiot if it doesn't work out.' "
Scott Adams
People
Idiot
Back
" I'm surrendering myself to the realities of the Internet. "
Scott Adams
Internet
Myself
Realities
" I've tried lots of things. The reality is, I'm excited by everything on Day 1. And if by Day X things aren't working the way I hoped, I lose my passion. I have not seen the correlation between my passion and my success. "
Scott Adams
Success
Day
Lose
" The only risk of failure is promotion. "
Scott Adams
Promotion
Risk
Failure
" My old life - no amount of getting used to it would have made it right. "
Scott Adams
Life
Made
Old
" I hated my work. It never seemed to me to be what I should be doing. "
Scott Adams
Me
Hated
Doing
" In less enlightened times, the best way to impress women was to own a hot car. But women wised up and realized it was better to buy their own hot cars so they wouldn't have to ride around with jerks. "
Scott Adams
Best
Car
Women
" I get mail; therefore I am. "
Scott Adams
Get
Mail
Therefore
" Let's form proactive synergy restructuring teams. "
Scott Adams
Restructuring
Synergy
Teams
" When you hire that first person, then you're a boss. You've got performance reviews. You've got complaints about not making enough money. You've got people who are just going to sell your story to the tabloids. "
Scott Adams
Story
Money
Boss
" The world is like a reverse casino. In a casino, if you gamble long enough, you're certainly going to lose. But in the real world, where the only thing you're gambling is, say, your time or your embarrassment, then the more stuff you do, the more you give luck a chance to find you. "
Scott Adams
Time
Chance
Gambling
" Success is entirely accessible, even if you happen to be a huge screw-up 95 percent of the time. "
Scott Adams
You
Time
Success Is
" There's kind of a toll you have to pay with a cat; if you don't pet her for 10 minutes she'll bother you for six hours. "
Scott Adams
She
You
Kind
" I think if you talk to anybody who ever went from not having much to having enough to buy what they wanted, they're always happier. Now I get that whole '$75,000 a year is some kind of magic number,' but my experience is 'more is better, up to a point.' Then there's a point where it doesn't make any difference. "
Scott Adams
Better
You
Think
" Informed decision-making comes from a long tradition of guessing and then blaming others for inadequate results. "
Scott Adams
Business
Long
Tradition
" If you drill down on any success story, you always discover that luck was a huge part of it. You can't control luck, but you can move from a game with bad odds to one with better odds. You can make it easier for luck to find you. The most useful thing you can do is stay in the game. "
Scott Adams
Luck
Game
Story
" I'm a poor artist. Through brute force, I brought myself up to mediocre. I've never taken a writing class, but I can write okay. "
Scott Adams
I Can
Myself
Writing
" If you have a reasonable system for pursuing success, it can survive a lot of face-plants along the way. That knowledge makes success seem accessible. If you think successful people have some sort of superpower or special connections, why try? "
Scott Adams
You
People
Knowledge
" I have a perverse attraction to risk. Not physical risk but emotional, financial risk - anything than can't kill you immediately. "
Scott Adams
Than
You
Emotional
" Free will is an illusion. People always choose the perceived path of greatest pleasure. "
Scott Adams
Choose
Free
Illusion
" You don't have to be a 'person of influence' to be influential. In fact, the most influential people in my life are probably not even aware of the things they've taught me. "
Scott Adams
Influence
People
My Life
" Remind people that profit is the difference between revenue and expense. This makes you look smart. "
Scott Adams
You
Smart
People
" The longer you work here, diverse it gets. "
Scott Adams
Diverse
You
Gets
" Engineers like to solve problems. If there are no problems handily available, they will create their own problems. "
Scott Adams
Engineers
Create
Will
" If you see voters as rational, you'll be a terrible politician. People are not wired to be rational. Our brains simply evolved to keep us alive. Brains did not evolve to give us truth. Brains merely give us movies in our minds that keeps us sane and motivated. But none of it is rational or true, except maybe sometimes by coincidence. "
Scott Adams
You
Minds
Movies