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" The future and eternity are two entirely different things. "

Douglas Coupland

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" The harder you try to become the opposite of your parents, the more quickly you become them. "

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" We really ought to give ourselves a collective pat on the back for doing as well as we have in a universe of constant media change and mutation. "

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" Human beings are the only animal that thinks they change who they are simply by moving to a different place. Birds migrate, but it's not quite the same thing. "

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" Purchased experiences don't count. "

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" Failure is authentic, and because it's authentic, it's real and genuine, and because of that, it's a pure state of being. "

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" To have a healthy culture, you have to have stable health care financing and stable arts financing and stable sports financing, and if you don't have that, your culture becomes a parking lot. "

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" The thing about living in the 21st century is you can get to fortysomething and not have anyone major in your life die. "

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" Bespoke tailoring: yes! I found this one pair of pants - they're Canali - and brought them into a tailor and said, 'Clone these, dammit.' They just do all the right things. I've got eight pairs in different colors and I never have to think about pants again. The only look otherwise that suits me is, like, the Professor from 'Gilligan's Island.' "

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" We were never supposed to live until 40. We were built to self-destruct at 30, whether from cancer or mental illness. We're all going way beyond our expiration date. "

Douglas Coupland

" Aliens didn't come down to Earth and give us technology. We invented it ourselves. Therefore it can never be alienating; it can only be an expression of our humanity. "

Douglas Coupland

" I love working out how things are made, which is why I have so many models of towers. "

Douglas Coupland

" No-tech tourism is a form of temporal eco-tourism in which one reads books or watches film and TV precisely because of the absence of 21st-century technologies. "

Douglas Coupland

" If I think too much about all of those Chinese factories where all the stuff in a Wal-Mart is made, I get that woozy feeling you get when you see ducks covered in crude oil. "

Douglas Coupland

" Workshops and seminars are basically financial speed dating for clueless people. "

Douglas Coupland

" The universe hands you opportunities for a while, and if you don't take them, the universe says to itself, 'Oh I see, this person doesn't like opportunities' and stops giving them to you. "

Douglas Coupland

" If money is not maintained, it can collapse like a bridge along Interstate 5 and fixing it, even with determined politicians, will take ages, during which time God only knows how much human damage will occur. "

Douglas Coupland

" If you write fiction, you have to love your characters. It's like your family. You don't have to like them, but you have to love them. "

Douglas Coupland

" I keep vampire hours, going to bed at 2 A.M. and waking up at about 10:30-11 A.M. "

Douglas Coupland

" My life is neither a disaster nor supernatural, yet it is an unlikely event. "

Douglas Coupland

" Storytelling is ultimately a creative act of pattern recognition. Through characters, plot and setting, a writer creates places where previously invisible truths become visible. Or the storyteller posits a series of dots that the reader can connect. "

Douglas Coupland

" When I look at my daily schedule, I feel like a trout flopping about on a dock, drowning in the air. Some people are ruthless with their schedules. Not me. I wing it. "

Douglas Coupland

" My house. It's kind of eccentric. It's two decades worth of accumulated personal projects. Yeah, it is pretty dense in my house. "

Douglas Coupland

" Make your goals big and broad enough so that they never become answered prayers and boomerang to curse you. "

Douglas Coupland

" Long lives aren't natural. We forget that senior citizens are as much an invention as toasters or penicillin. "

Douglas Coupland

" The one thing about my life that's different from others is that I wake up for no one, and for some reason, that's just good for your creativity. "

Douglas Coupland

" I think way back, the '20s or the '30s, when Kodak came out with the Brownie and they put a list of instructions on the box, like how to use this thing, I think someone arbitrarily said, 'Make sure the person in the photograph is smiling.' And we went from that one sort of set of industrial instructions to this whole culture of perkiness. "

Douglas Coupland

" Before machines the only form of entertainment people really had was relationships. "

Douglas Coupland

" Making eye contact with adults while dressed as a clown is risky. "

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" Whatever happened to books? Suddenly everybody's talking about these 100-hour movies called 'Breaking Bad'. People are talking about TV the same way they used to talk about novels back in the 1980s. I like to think I hang out with some pretty smart people, but all they talk about is 'Breaking Bad.' "

Douglas Coupland

" Cloning is great. If God made the original, then making copies should be fine. "

Douglas Coupland