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" The perpetuation of slavery, the exile and extermination of American Indians, and the passage of Jim Crow laws weren't carried out at the bidding of a few malefactors of great wealth. "
P. J. O'Rourke
American
Great
Laws
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" The District of Columbia is an extreme example of disconnect between financial input and educational outcome. Unfortunately, extreme is not the same as abnormal. "
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" I realised the bohemian life was not for me. I would look around at my friends, living like starving artists, and wonder, 'Where's the art?' They weren't doing anything. And there was so much interesting stuff to do, so much fun to be had... maybe I could even quit renting. "
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" The one thing that's terrible about traveling for fun is writing about it. "
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" I'm a member of the 1960s generation. We didn't have any wisdom. "
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" Tom DeLay may or may not have broken campaign finance laws, but he did his best to look like he was breaking them. "
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" Like most sensible people, you probably lost interest in modern art about the time that Julian Schnabel was painting broken pieces of the crockery that his wife had thrown at him for painting broken pieces of crockery instead of painting the bathroom and hall. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Time
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" In Toledo, people grow out. Out to the suburbs. Out to the parts of America where the economy is more vigorous. And all too often, out to 48-inch waistbands. "
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" Making fun of born-again Christians is like hunting dairy cows with a high powered rifle and scope. "
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" Seriousness is stupidity sent to college. "
P. J. O'Rourke
College
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Seriousness
" I don't mind America becoming a Third World country. The weather is better in the Third World than it is where I live in New Hampshire. And household help will be much cheaper. "
P. J. O'Rourke
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" People are not ants or bees. We do not reason or love or live or die collectively. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Reason
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" A humorist doesn't really do that much note-taking. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Humorist
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Much
" You can't get rid of poverty by giving people money. "
P. J. O'Rourke
You
People
Money
" The world is being run by irresponsible spoiled brats. "
P. J. O'Rourke
World
Irresponsible
Run
" Everybody is xenophobic to an extent. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Xenophobic
Extent
Everybody
" I am unboreable in the great outdoors. "
P. J. O'Rourke
I Am
Am
Great
" I have no idea if some societies, anthropologically speaking, aren't really suited for democracy. I don't think that's true. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Think
Democracy
True
" Fascism is very much a mob movement. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Much
Fascism
Mob
" Jack Abramoff is the world's best lobbyist - for the Federal Penitentiary System. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Jack
Best
Federal
" Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Power
Car
Giving
" Regulation creates a moral hazard. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Hazard
Regulation
Moral
" Never fight an inanimate object. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Object
Fight
Funny
" There is only one thing that gives me hope as a Republican, and that is the Democrats. It's going to be hard to do a worse job running American than the Republicans have, but if anybody can do it, it's the Democrats. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Republican
American
Hope
" No industry in living memory has collapsed faster than daily print journalism. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Journalism
Memory
Print
" The poor are an especially important resource for innovation when they have the bravery and pluck to get out of the poor places in which they're living. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Innovation
Bravery
Important
" I understand Twitter has become popular among politicians. This technology allows them to stay in perpetual contact with their constituents. The electorate now has instant information about what politicians have been up to. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Technology
Information
Politicians
" Once you've built the big machinery of political power, remember you won't always be the one to run it. "
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Run
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" Democrats hate stay-at-home spouses, no matter what gender or gender preference. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Gender
Spouses
Matter
" Toledo is better than exciting, it's happy. Because nothing is more conducive to unhappiness than taking yourself seriously, and taking yourself seriously is difficult when you're baseball team is the Mud Hens. "
P. J. O'Rourke
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Team
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" Jeans fit the mature male one of two ways, both dirigible in nature. You make a public impression that's either Hindenburg or Goodyear blimp. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Two
Mature
You