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" To me all men are equal: there are jackasses everywhere, and I have the same contempt for them all. "

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" There are people who can never forgive a beggar for their not having given him anything. "

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" Scandal begins when the police put a stop to it. "

" No ideas and the ability to express them - that's a journalist. "

" Do not learn more than you absolutely need to get through life. "

" Children play soldier. That makes sense. But why do soldiers play children? "

" I had a terrible vision: I saw an encyclopedia walk up to a polymath and open him up. "

" There is no more unfortunate creature under the sun than a fetishist who yearns for a woman's shoe and has to settle for the whole woman. "

" A child learns to discard his ideals, whereas a grown-up never wears out his short pants. "

" The sound principle of a topsy-turvy lifestyle in the framework of an upside-down world order has stood every test. "

" My unconscious knows more about the consciousness of the psychologist than his consciousness knows about my unconscious. "

" I don't like to meddle in my private affairs. "

" Corruption is worse than prostitution. The latter might endanger the morals of an individual, the former invariably endangers the morals of the entire country. "

" Jealousy is a dog's bark which attracts thieves. "

" Sex education is legitimate in that girls cannot be taught soon enough how children don't come into the world. "

" The closer the look one takes at a word, the greater distance from which it looks back. "

" Language is the mother of thought, not its handmaiden. "

" Journalist: a person without any ideas but with an ability to express them; a writer whose skill is improved by a deadline: the more time he has, the worse he writes. "

" Someone who can write aphorisms should not fritter away his time in essays. "

" Democracy divides people into workers and loafers. It makes no provision for those who have no time to work. "

" A fine world in which man reproaches woman with fulfilling his heart's desire! "

" You'd be surprised how hard it can often be to translate an action into an idea. "

" Journalists write because they have nothing to say, and have something to say because they write. "

" Feminine passion is to masculine as an epic is to an epigram. "

" The trouble with Germans is not that they fire shells, but that they engrave them with quotations from Kant. "

" Stupidity is an elemental force for which no earthquake is a match. "

" It is better not to express what one means than to express what one does not mean. "

" I and life: The case was settled chivalrously. The opponents parted without having made up. "

" Christian morality prefers remorse to precede lust, and then lust not to follow. "