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" Everyone self-Googles. And, I have, of course, the Google alert. "

Sarah Silverman

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" I looked up and saw the shape of a heart made by the silhouette of Ben Affleck and Matt Damon kissing. "

Sarah Silverman

" I like my messiness on stage, though I watch comics who come at a joke from every angle and I think, 'Yeah! That's how it's done!' But for me it's the audience. If I feel connected to them, I have so much fun, and if not, it stinks. "

Sarah Silverman

" I'm not the marrying type, but I always want to be with someone who is a fan. "

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" I have very vivid dreams - almost always action-adventure. I'm often on the run. I've always had dreams. When I was little, I'd go to sleep with my head on my hands, which were in fists like I was looking through a camera. I felt like sleep was the movies - just drifting off to the movies. "

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" As a kid, I was terrified. I was a bed wetter, and I had to go to sleepaway camp every summer, which was humiliating and terrifying. I had lots of insecurities and scaredness. "

Sarah Silverman

" They've got great parents; I'm just trying to be the fun uncle. "

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" I love making videos on my couch. You can put those on the Internet fast. I can express myself. "

Sarah Silverman

" I just think of myself as a comedian, really. "

Sarah Silverman

" You're supposed to have friends you can tell anything to. "

Sarah Silverman

" It fills me with a weird rage to wear shoes that make me not able to walk easily or run if I had to. It feeds into this whole 'war on women' thing in my head. "

Sarah Silverman

" I definitely think that prescription drugs, like antidepressants, are prescribed so cavalierly, anyone can get anything, but I need it. I do think that it needs to work hand and hand with therapy. "

Sarah Silverman

" Relations between black and white would be greatly improved if we were more accepting of our fears and our feelings and more vocal about it. "

Sarah Silverman

Black And White

" What are the chances there is a God, really? "

Sarah Silverman

" I really think everything is fair game. "

Sarah Silverman

" I enjoy the last quarter of all basketball games. "

Sarah Silverman

" You know, I think whatever a comic talks about onstage is all they talk about offstage. "

Sarah Silverman

" I'm always writing; I'm always jotting things down on paper or making notes in my iPhone. Then I'll make myself sit down and kind of shape it up, but there's really no other way to practice other than onstage. "

Sarah Silverman

" Men like to squash you. I just want someone who's happy with himself, happy with his life. He doesn't have to squash mine. "

Sarah Silverman

" Smells definitely do have a crazy impact on me. "

Sarah Silverman

" I started out in clubs, and I've always liked clubs. I like theaters because people are there for the show. "

Sarah Silverman

" If I have kids, I'll adopt. "

Sarah Silverman

" I'd love to do drama if it was interesting. "

Sarah Silverman

" I still have highs and lows, maybe I don't cry salty tears as much. "

Sarah Silverman

" I like my life alone. "

Sarah Silverman

" My growing up years, we watched 'Happy Days,' every night. I don't know what was reruns and what was new. "

Sarah Silverman

" It shows the truth - that the real meaning of a word is only as powerful or harmless as the emotion behind it. "

Sarah Silverman

" I mean, I talk about being Jewish a lot. It's funny because I do think of myself as Jewish ethnically, but I'm not religious at all. I have no religion. "

Sarah Silverman

" You want to make people laugh and by virtue of that please them, but when you're instructed to make people laugh and please them, you're too resentful to do it. "

Sarah Silverman

" The first time I did stand-up I was 17, and I was really a stand-up once I was 19 in New York, and now I'm 41, and I still feel like I haven't found myself onstage. Earlier in my career, I was really tight, really together, and knew who I was and I was confident. "

Sarah Silverman

" I think I've been called edgy - but in all honesty, there is a safety in what I do because I'm always the idiot. Unless you're just listening to buzz words and not taking into account the context of the situation, you see I'm always the ignoramus. "

Sarah Silverman