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" 'The Babadook,' written and directed by a woman, is a gorgeously told female-focused story of grief, longing, loneliness, and what mourning can become. "
Emily V. Gordon
Become
Woman
Grief
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" People get married for a wide array of reasons and have all sorts of expectations of how marriage will change the relationship. And while it's true that turning the person you're dating into a legal partner does affect certain things, those who expect marriage to be a cure-all for all your relationship woes are sorely mistaken. "
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" There is no level of professional rejection that can compare to almost dying. "
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" I have multiple tattoos. "
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" I'm not an actress. I'm a writer. "
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" You're not a victim of your divorce. What you decide to do with yourself and your personal life after your marriage ends is your decision, and completely under your control. "
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" Nothing makes a girl feel as unsexy as divorce. "
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" I am somewhat grateful to the disintegration of my marriage for teaching me a lot about myself and about relationships, and though I wish it hadn't been such a taxing lesson, I wouldn't change a thing. "
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" As any daytime judge show can tell you, spending someone's money or taking their stuff because they hurt your feelings is not justified. "
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" Love is a good thing. "
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" If you've experienced cheating in a new marriage, the real work is not obsessively combing through all the details of what happened, but rather figuring out if your relationship is worth saving. "
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" A lot of people end up getting married more out of expectation than out of passion for each other, but if your options have ever been, 'We either get married or break up,' be careful. Marriage should be a new addition you add to the house that is your relationship, not the structure you impose on the house once it's already built. "
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" Awkward conversations are painful, but they're way easier than divorce, resentment, and heartbreak. "
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" I grew up in a town where there were no Muslims whatsoever, and there was not a lot of exposure. "
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" Sacrificing your relationship for your career sounds noble and romantic from the outside, but the reality is that it can create a pattern of self-destruction that will ultimately burn you out on the career you've worked so hard to build. It's a trap and, for some, an easy way out of having to maintain relationships under stress. "
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" I'm tired of hearing about 'Damages,' I don't care how life-changing 'The Wire' is, and I don't want to hear another word about 'Battlestar Galactica' or its super-awesome ending. "
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" Unequivocally, individual human beings who live together will always have different standards of what a 'clean house' looks like. "
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" Marriage will not change your spouse. It will not make him or her more mature, more loyal to you, or better at housework. "
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" Women are encouraged to go on an emotional journey of self-care after a divorce, while men are expected to need help learning how to cook and parent on their own. "
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" Women compete, compare, undermine, and undercut one another - at least, that is the prevailing notion of how we interact. "
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Compete
Women
Undermine
" Far from 'rotting my brain,' as I was often told would happen, TV helped me feel less alone at a time when I spent so much time alone. "
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" You didn't have to know anything about show business to appreciate the characters' humor, because at its heart, 'Party Down' was about following dreams, dealing with rejection, and surviving all the lame jobs we've all had to work just to get by in the meantime. "
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" If you don't simply communicate with your spouse what household tasks you would like them to do, you are setting yourself up to be angry. "
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" If you've had a marriage that ended because of a betrayal in trust on your spouse's behalf, the idea of trusting another person with your heart can seem completely ridiculous. "
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" Marriage is not a magical potion that serves to amplify adoration, reduce deep-seated feelings of resentment, erase fears of commitment, or answer questions about whether or not this is the right move. Marriage is a ceremony that cements your current bond to another human being, and while that's a huge thing, that's all it does. "
Emily V. Gordon
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Questions
" Marriage, even a happy and successful one, can be extremely stressful, but that stress is worth it if you're marrying the best person for you. "
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" Keeping physical items from the past is important - we keep old toys, grandparents' jewelry, yearbooks, dance recital programs - and we assign meaning to them. Those items become the memories, and that's a very healthy thing to do. The problems occur when we have too many of those sentimental items, and they start weighing us down. "
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Past
Dance
Problems
" Some divorcees turn their pain inward. They brood, and they grieve for a long time, always wondering if they could have done something differently to keep this from happening. They make every problem in their relationship into something they could have prevented. "
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" Your life story is a gift, and it should be treated as such. "
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" As my marriage was slowly dissolving into silent meals and awkward nights of avoiding conversation, I started pondering an unmarried future and wondered if I'd ever be able to hack being single again. "
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" I had a tightly knit group of female friends in elementary school - we called ourselves the Sensational Six. "
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