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" When we each focus on being the dominant force in our own universe rather than invading other universes, we all win. "
Emily V. Gordon
Force
Focus
Win
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" Nothing makes a girl feel as unsexy as divorce. "
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" It's absolutely amazing to me that anyone allowed their children to watch 'The Ren & Stimpy Show' in the '90s; it's dark, gross, nihilistic, and absolutely bizarre. "
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" I have a pretty intense work ethic. If something's not done, I cannot let go until I get it done. "
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" If you've had a marriage that ended because of a betrayal in trust on your spouse's behalf, the idea of trusting another person with your heart can seem completely ridiculous. "
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" Without knowing your own history, you are doomed to repeat it. "
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" I haven't always been the best advocate for my own body. I was a too-tall, pudgy child who felt completely out of control of the genetic lottery ticket she'd been given, so in retaliation, I shut down. I ignored my body and hated it for not being tiny and cute like my friends' bodies. "
Emily V. Gordon
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" Divorce is one of the most destructive, emotionally traumatic experiences a human being can go through, no matter if you're the instigator or the recipient. It's hard, and it hurts, and it takes a long time to feel normal again. "
Emily V. Gordon
Long Time
Long
Divorce
" Experiences don't make us damaged goods; it's what we do with those experiences that matters. "
Emily V. Gordon
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Matters
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" Stays at the in-laws' aren't inherently sexy. "
Emily V. Gordon
Inherently
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" Marriage, or any committed partnership, has become sacred to me, powerful and fragile all at the same time. "
Emily V. Gordon
Powerful
Time
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" Unequivocally, individual human beings who live together will always have different standards of what a 'clean house' looks like. "
Emily V. Gordon
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" Do remember to pick your battles when you start parenting your stepchildren. "
Emily V. Gordon
Parenting
You
Start
" Cheating is very rarely about the actual act of being with another person. "
Emily V. Gordon
Being
Person
Cheating
" Marriage will not change your spouse. It will not make him or her more mature, more loyal to you, or better at housework. "
Emily V. Gordon
Change
You
Marriage
" A lot of new stepparents fall into the trap of letting children disobey household expectations in order to gain favor with them. "
Emily V. Gordon
Fall
Expectations
Children
" The benefits of a healthy, thriving relationship may not be nearly as exciting as watching your career take off, but both aspects of your life are equally important. "
Emily V. Gordon
Relationship
Life
Important
" Post-divorce, the world can feel harsh and full of jagged edges. "
Emily V. Gordon
Full
Feel
World
" In my professional and personal life, when I meet people who feel broken after a divorce, they can usually be divided into two categories: those who truly believe there's something wrong with them, and those that are using their status as armor. "
Emily V. Gordon
Divorce
Life
People
" Men - not all men but a good majority of the ones I have known and worked with - tend to think of difficult situations in their lives as problems that need to be solved. "
Emily V. Gordon
Men
Problems
Think
" Get married wherever you like, make accommodations for the people you love so they can attend, and forget about the people who can't. "
Emily V. Gordon
Forget
You
People
" 'The Babadook,' written and directed by a woman, is a gorgeously told female-focused story of grief, longing, loneliness, and what mourning can become. "
Emily V. Gordon
Become
Woman
Grief
" As any daytime judge show can tell you, spending someone's money or taking their stuff because they hurt your feelings is not justified. "
Emily V. Gordon
Feelings
You
Tell
" I don't remember being put into the coma, but I do have a lot of weird memories from being under. This may be because I was in a coma via medicine rather than trauma. That time period played out for me as one long rambling dream where I was at a hospital to visit my boyfriend, who I thought was in an accident. "
Emily V. Gordon
Medicine
Time
Thought
" After my divorce, I took some time off from having a romantic life to begin the tough work of figuring out where I'd gone wrong and what on Earth I could do to understand how to be a whole person in a relationship. "
Emily V. Gordon
Romantic
Time
Work
" There's nothing like listening to the drone of QVC's always-bubbly pitchwomen, as they try to move loose-fitting tunics with 'just the right amount of sparkle,' to soothe you into a healing slumber. "
Emily V. Gordon
Try
Nothing
Listening
" Love is a good thing. "
Emily V. Gordon
Love
A Good Thing
Love Is
" In high school, I decided that all of my female friends were stupid and traded them for guy friends. I loved horror movies and heavy metal and used these interests to become a 'guys' girl.' "
Emily V. Gordon
Girl
High School
Loved
" I thought of 'The Big Sick' as a placeholder title, to be completely honest. I've grown to love it. "
Emily V. Gordon
Love
Title
Thought
" Marriage is not a magical potion that serves to amplify adoration, reduce deep-seated feelings of resentment, erase fears of commitment, or answer questions about whether or not this is the right move. Marriage is a ceremony that cements your current bond to another human being, and while that's a huge thing, that's all it does. "
Emily V. Gordon
Bond
Marriage
Questions
" Nothing makes me feel more mushy and full of love for my husband than going back and looking at our flirtation unfolding online. I love reading our old e-mails, texts, and Gchats. "
Emily V. Gordon
Looking
Husband
Old