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" I have an endless stream of suggestions coming in from readers who are in cubicles. That keeps me going. "

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" I'm a poor artist. Through brute force, I brought myself up to mediocre. I've never taken a writing class, but I can write okay. "

" I get mail; therefore I am. "

" I would sometimes sit in a crowded restaurant, and say, 'You know, I'm the only person in this restaurant who can't draw.' "

" The creator of the universe works in mysterious ways. But he uses a base ten counting system and likes round numbers. "

" If you drill down on any success story, you always discover that luck was a huge part of it. You can't control luck, but you can move from a game with bad odds to one with better odds. You can make it easier for luck to find you. The most useful thing you can do is stay in the game. "

" There's kind of a toll you have to pay with a cat; if you don't pet her for 10 minutes she'll bother you for six hours. "

" The greenest home is the one you don't build. If you really want to save the Earth, move in with another family and share a house that's already built. Better yet, live in the forest and eat whatever the squirrels don't want. "

" Be careful that what you write does not offend anybody or cause problems within the company. The safest approach is to remove all useful information. "

" My old life - no amount of getting used to it would have made it right. "

" I don't get embarrassed by the same things that other people do. I would say that probably the biggest thing that holds people back is, 'If I do this, I'm going to look like an idiot if it doesn't work out.' "

" Many, if not most, career opportunities come to you through people you know. So the more people you know, the more opportunities you have. Improving your social network is a great example of a system for moving from lower odds to better odds without having a specific goal. "

" There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved through a suitable application of high explosives. "

" Engineers like to solve problems. If there are no problems handily available, they will create their own problems. "

" Rotten bosses don't get better. Any strategy that assumes they can is doomed. "

" We don't always have an accurate view of our own potential. I think most people who are frightened of public speaking and can't imagine they might feel different as a result of training. Don't assume you know how much potential you have. Sometimes the only way to know what you can do is to test yourself. "

" For most of my career I did one comic a day, every day, including weekends and holidays. "

" If a job's worth doing, it's too hard. "

" In less enlightened times, the best way to impress women was to own a hot car. But women wised up and realized it was better to buy their own hot cars so they wouldn't have to ride around with jerks. "

" When you hire that first person, then you're a boss. You've got performance reviews. You've got complaints about not making enough money. You've got people who are just going to sell your story to the tabloids. "

" Women are treated differently by society for exactly the same reason that children and the mentally handicapped are treated differently. "

" I've always defined myself not as a cartoonist, but as an entrepreneur. That was true before I tried cartooning. I always imagined cartooning would be how I got my seed capital. I always thought my other businesses would be the less dominant part of my life. "

" My investments have been hurt. "

" You don't have to be a 'person of influence' to be influential. In fact, the most influential people in my life are probably not even aware of the things they've taught me. "

" The longer you work here, diverse it gets. "

" I had several different bosses during the early years of 'Dilbert.' They were all pretty sure I was mocking someone else. "

" The computer cuts my production time in half. I love it. "

" Work is like the rest of life. The best parts are free. "

" Informed decision-making comes from a long tradition of guessing and then blaming others for inadequate results. "

" The best things in life are silly. "

" Normal people... believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet. "