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" I'm no Jerry Seinfeld. I wasn't raised with some backyard with a creek and trees and all that. "

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" I'm a big, big movie fan. I watch 'The Ten Commandments' and the original 'Planet of the Apes' every night. "

" I was never a big comic book fan. I was always more into the baseball cards. "

" So I think all comedians are earning their wings into heaven. We're all going to heaven, but everybody's not going to get their wings. Some people are just going to be regular angels. Doing cleanup, janitor work. In heaven, I'm going to sit on the couch with Oprah. "

" For my first gig, I got $75. I could make money being funny, so I pursued it as a career and have turned it into a lucrative business. "

" I love working with Alec Baldwin. He's one of the five greatest actors ever to live. "

" Tracy Morgan is subdued. I'm cool. I'm chilled out. "

" Of all the sicknesses, there is probably none more abusive than homophobia. "

" I don't have anything against Jimmy Fallon. I love Jimmy Fallon. He's my dude. "

" Growing up in the ghetto is pretty hard. It's poverty; it's frustration. "

" I'm a black man in America, so I'm going to be misunderstood. "

" I do comedy for real people. "

" Yeah, race exists. Racism is still here, and it's doing well. Turn on the news. I don't think me and my comedy can really change that. "

" Anybody who's lived in the ghetto knows that you don't move during the daytime. Here's why: You don't want anyone to know you're leaving, and you don't want anyone knowing where you're going. "

" A stand-up's job is to hold the mirror up to society and to look at what we're afraid of. That's why we had shows like 'All in the Family' and 'The Jeffersons.' We made fun of ourselves then. "

" To me, politics is a pile of tricks. "

" If I get some Bruce Lee nun-chucks that he actually used in a movie, those are going in the case. Those will never be used. Those will never be touched. "

" Reality is the scary thing. Not my work, not comedy. "

" Cool is the enemy of funny. You can't be cool and be funny at the same time. Only Eddie Murphy could do that. "

" Stand-up is my foundation. That's where it started at. And I love it because it's personal. It's mine. It's all me. It's my experience in life. "

" The truth is, I've never thought of myself as the Michael Jordan of comedy. And that's a good thing. You know why? Because I'm not. Wasn't that Richard Pryor? Yes, it was. I know what I am: I'm funny! "

" There aren't a lot of guys out there keeping it real. Everybody's been branded. Everybody's been bought and sold. "

" Who's coming with me? I don't know where I'm going, but who's coming with me? "

" It's very important to be in your child's life and know what's going on and be there with them. "

" Even when I'm sitting up in this glass castle, I still got my street soldiers telling me what's happening. "

" I have snakes, three sharks, moray eels, piranhas, five scorpions and a bird spider. All of them are predators. They are dangerous but it's cool to have strong and powerful pets. "

" If you can survive 'Saturday Night Live,' then you're good as far as show business is concerned. "

" That's a gift God's given us: the ability to work together in collaborations. "

" Ladies are honest. They're my motivation. They know what's funny, and the dudes just follow. "

" I want to be an example of a guy who made something of himself out of nothing. A guy who overcame the odds of a tough childhood, who worked hard, who didn't let his surroundings get the best of him and lead him to jail or the graveyard. Where I ended up - being a comedian, a TV star, and a movie actor - might be unique, but my story is not. "

" No one set that I ever do is the same. I mean, if I go to a comedy club, and I perform three sets, all three sets are different because anything can happen in between sets. "