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" My father described this tall lady who stands in the middle of the New York harbor, holding high a torch to welcome people seeking freedom in America. I instantly fell in love. "

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" I believe that love and laughter can only happen when one person takes the time to think about what would cause the other person to feel good. "

Yakov Smirnoff

Good

Time

Laughter

" To my real estate agent, Chernobyl is a fixer-upper. "

" The reason gas prices are so high is because the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma and all the dipsticks are in Washington. "

" Balance is so important in our lives. In our busy world, we can give ourselves balance between thinking and feeling. "

" I fed my ego, but not my soul. "

" In today's society we sometimes forget to balance our hearts and our heads; this is the reason we stop laughing. "

" I came to America to make it my home, and I did. "

" It's kind of bittersweet. The human spirit is not measured by the size of the act, but by the size of the heart. "

" As Americans after 9/11, we're much more united, together as a nation, and we got stronger, better, and more at peace. By peace, I mean the harmony you can feel in our united determination to fight these terrorists and killers. "

" Homosexuality in Russia is a crime and the punishment is seven years in prison, locked up with the other men. There is a three year waiting list. "

" Men and women are immigrants in each other's worlds. "

" I believe that laughter is a language of God and that we can all live happily ever laughter. "

" I was not only typecast as a Russian, but I was typecast as Yakov Smirnoff. This is understandable, and I was very happy to get the roles, but it would be nice to be in a movie where I could be someone else. "

" Americans think Soviets are so grim. I want them to see that they can smile. "

" I believe there is a direct correlation between love and laughter. "

" When you like something, you find time to do it. "

Yakov Smirnoff

Find

You

" When the needs of one person are being met by the other, there is laughter. "

" Laughter is the shortest distance between two people. "

" If you have something important to say, Broadway and New York are great places to say it. "

" The ad in the paper said 'Big Sale. Last Week.' Why advertise? I already missed it. They're just rubbing it in. "

" After the Soviet Union collapsed, people thought I wasn't funny anymore. "

" Everybody laughs the same in every language because laughter is a universal connection. "

" We have been learning since we were children how to make money, buy things, build things. The whole education system is set up to teach us how to think, not to feel. "

Yakov Smirnoff

Money

Learning

" There's depth in my comedy. "

Yakov Smirnoff

Comedy

Depth

" I was this non-threatening funny guy who contrasted the image of the Brezhnevs and the Reagans of the world. "

" We have a choice - we can both think and feel, using our heads and our hearts. "

" We may have forgotten how to feel. Nobody is teaching us how to live happily ever after, as we've heard in fairy tales. "

Yakov Smirnoff

Teacher

Nobody

" I like American women. They do things sexually Russian girls never dream of doing - like showering. "

" Falling in love is a chemical reaction. But it wears off in a year. That's why you need a strong line of communication... which includes laughter. "

" If love is the treasure, laughter is the key. "