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" Excessive speed and quantity are, like chattiness and digression, besetting sins of cyber-assisted authorship. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Quantity
Excessive
Sins
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" Nobody is making Americans buy Chinese goods. "
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" To mistrust science and deny the validity of scientific method is to resign your job as a human. You'd better go look for work as a plant or wild animal. "
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" Health care's not about insurance! Health care's about getting treatment. "
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" Maybe the real secret to America's greatness is that we hate one another. "
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" The difference between American parties is actually simple. Democrats are in favor of higher taxes to pay for greater spending, while Republicans are in favor of greater spending, for which the taxpayers will pay. "
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" The bar is set pretty low if you want to be a hip, accessible conservative. "
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" America wasn't founded so that we could all be better. America was founded so we could all be anything we damned well pleased. "
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Pleased
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" In Israel, waves of anger and fear circulate all the time, but so do jokes and gossip and silky evening breezes. So, too, in America. "
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Fear
Jokes
Waves
" Liberals want to live downtown. All over America - in New York, San Francisco, Chicago, Georgetown - there are crowds of liberals living in the gritty, ugly, dirty neighborhoods sensible people are trying to flee. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Live
People
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" Politicians will talk strategy and tactics and policies and programs until they're blue in the face, or you strangle them and they turn blue. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Strategy
You
Blue
" Ending wars is very simple if you surrender. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Simple
You
Surrender
" Adam Smith pointed out that there were three things that make us more prosperous, in a general sort of way: freedom to pursue our own self-interest; specialization, which he called division of labor; and freedom of trade. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Own
Three
Way
" After the events of the 20th century, God, quite reasonably, left Europe. But He's still here in the United States. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Left
Here
United States
" My whole family can talk. They are all car salesmen. They are all funny. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Car
Whole
Talk
" Even the dumber parts of our government are not run by idiots. These are ordinary people like us, doing a job. By and large, they're trying to do it as well as they can. Or at least as often as people in the private sector try to do as well as they can. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Government
Doing
Job
" Are you a Democrat because you're a union member? Then why, after eight years of Bill Clinton, does some Chinese guy in Guangdong province have your job? "
P. J. O'Rourke
Why
Years
You
" Once you've built the big machinery of political power, remember you won't always be the one to run it. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Run
You
Remember
" Predicting innovation is something of a self-canceling exercise: the most probable innovations are probably the least innovative. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Most
Something
Exercise
" The job of the president of the United States is to talk to the public, is to explain to them. Now, some presidents talk too much, like Bill Clinton. Some presidents try to talk but don't know how, like George Bush senior. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Try
Too Much
Job
" Nancy Pelosi says the angry opposition to health care reform is like the angry opposition to gay rights that led to Harvey Milk being shot. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Gay
Care
Health
" Writing is agony. I hate it. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Writing
Agony
Hate
" My wife and I both come from Irish families. There are two kinds of Irish families: the hitting kind and the kidding kind. If you're fortunate - and both of us are - you come from the kidding kind of Irish family. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Two
Family
Irish
" In thirteen years, every aspect of the universe can change - ask a thirteen-year-old. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Change
Years
Universe
" Children must be considered in a divorce considered valuable pawns in the nasty legal and financial contest that is about to ensue. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Divorce
Legal
Children
" Some day you will be wheeled in for a heart bypass operation, and a surgeon will be the person who is now behind the counter when you renew your car registration at the department of motor vehicles. "
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Car
You
Surgeon
" Tom DeLay may or may not have broken campaign finance laws, but he did his best to look like he was breaking them. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Best
Look
Like
" Democrats hate Democrats most of all. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Democrats
Most
Hate
" Maybe climate change is a threat, and maybe climate change has been tarted up by climatologists trolling for research grant cash. It doesn't matter. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Climate Change
Research
Change
" Children live in the only successful Marxist state ever created: the family. 'From each according to his ability, to each according to his need' is the family's practice as well as its theory. Even with today's scattershot patterns of marriage and parenting, a family is collectivist to a more than North Korean degree. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Today
Marriage
Family
" There are two factors in American politics that may seem strange to Europeans: race and religion. "
P. J. O'Rourke
Race
Religion
Two