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" Failing to be there when a man wants her is the greatest sin a woman can commit - except being there when he doesn't want her. "

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" Love, like a chicken salad or restaurant hash, must be taken with blind faith or it loses its flavor. "

" Telling lies is a fault in a boy, an art in a lover, an accomplishment in a bachelor, and second-nature in a married man. "

" Woman: the peg on which the wit hangs his jest, the preacher his text, the cynic his grouch and the sinner his justification. "

" Marriage is like twirling a baton, turning hand springs or eating with chopsticks. It looks easy until you try it. "

" And verily, a woman need know but one man well, in order to understand all men; whereas a man may know all women and understand not one of them. "

" Ever since Eve started it all by offering Adam the apple, woman's punishment has been to supply a man with food then suffer the consequences when it disagrees with him. "

" There are people whose watch stops at a certain hour and who remain permanently at that age. "

" Never trust a husband too far, nor a bachelor too near. "

" The hardest task in a girl's life is to prove to a man that his intentions are serious. "

" Marriage is the miracle that transforms a kiss from a pleasure into a duty. "

" When a man spends his time giving his wife criticism and advice instead of compliments, he forgets that it was not his good judgment, but his charming manners, that won her heart. "

" Nowadays love is a matter of chance, matrimony a matter of money and divorce a matter of course. "

" After marriage, a woman's sight becomes so keen that she can see right through her husband without looking at him, and a man's so dull that he can look right through his wife without seeing her. "

" Between lovers a little confession is a dangerous thing. "

" A man's desire for a son is usually nothing but the wish to duplicate himself in order that such a remarkable pattern may not be lost to the world. "

" The tenderest spot in a man's make-up is sometimes the bald spot on top of his head. "

" A man is like a cat; chase him and he will run - sit still and ignore him and he'll come purring at your feet. "

" When a man makes a woman his wife, it's the highest compliment he can pay her, and it's usually the last. "

" A man can become so accustomed to the thought of his own faults that he will begin to cherish them as charming little 'personal characteristics.' "

" No man can understand why a woman shouldn't prefer a good reputation to a good time. "

" When you see what some women marry, you realize how they must hate to work for a living. "

" In olden times sacrifices were made at the altar - a practice which is still continued. "

" Jealousy is the tie that binds, and binds, and binds. "

" Falling in love consists merely in uncorking the imagination and bottling the common sense. "

Falling In Love

" A wise woman puts a grain of sugar into everything she says to a man, and takes a grain of salt with everything he says to her. "

" A Bachelor of Arts is one who makes love to a lot of women, and yet has the art to remain a bachelor. "

" Variety is the spice of love. "

" Some women can be fooled all of the time, and all women can be fooled some of the time, but the same woman can't be fooled by the same man in the same way more than half of the time. "

" The woman who appeals to a man's vanity may stimulate him, the woman who appeals to his heart may attract him, but it is the woman who appeals to his imagination who gets him. "

" Life begins at 40 - but so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story to the same person, three or four times. "