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" I did sketch comedy, but I never did improv. So I've just tried to learn as I go. "

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" I know I'd be an absolutely horrendous politician. "

" I'm always interested in audience interaction. Not so much aggressive audience interaction - I'm genuinely interested in how people see things. "

" Stand-up, for me, is really more of an addiction, so you have to feed the beast whenever you can. "

" We invented words; we'll tell you how they're supposed to sound. "

" The moment I accept that there's an artistic, redeeming quality in puns, I have a horrible feeling I'll get hooked. "

" As any Brit will understand, things get a little easier when you don't have to be number one any more. Really, the fall of an empire is not as bad as everyone thinks. It's like retirement. People fear retirement, but it can turn out be rather pleasant. "

" I get nostalgic for British negativity. There is an inherent hope and positive drive to New Yorkers. When you go back to Britain, everybody is just running everything down. It's like whatever the opposite of a hug is. "

" People, I guess, generally come to see me do stand-up with a working knowledge of my broad sense of humor on 'The Daily Show'... I don't think anyone would mistake me as an actual anchor. "

" I do one accent - my own. I can make it louder or quieter. That is the sum total of my vocal range. I thought I could do an American accent until I tried it in front of an American - the expression of horror is still burnt onto my retinas. "

" You just try to be true to your idea of what is funny and what is also interesting. "

" Having a human conversation is not something I've had any training in either as a comedian or as, you know, a human being. "

" It's exciting to have a role in anything that's Claymation, just because you're always intrigued by what a clay wizard version of yourself would be. "

" I really love stand-up. I'm more than happy to do it for nothing. I've come to America to do it for nothing. It's the American Dream: Work for free. "

" If I wanted to take a more activist or journalistic slant in work, I should probably just go be an activist or a journalist. But I'm happy being a comedian. "

" When you're dealing with serious subjects, there is a pressure to be absolutely sure that you know what you're doing. "

" If you're asking me, would I have voted for Mitt Romney, the answer is absolutely not. Emphatically not. I cannot envision a world in which I would have voted for Mitt Romney unless I sustained a massive concussion. "

" You can write jokes at any point of the day. Jokes are not that hard to write, or they shouldn't be when it is literally your job. "

" Here in America, people come out to see what they've known you to do. In England, it's like everyone comes out to tell you exactly how well they think you're doing. "

" It really helps a comedian to be an outsider. "

" When you're doing stand-up, you want to stand onstage and, to the extent that you can, uncomplicatedly entertain. "

" Politicians don't really bring up religion in England. "

" Sometimes it's good to remember how bad food can be, so you can enjoy the concept of flavour to the fullest. "

" Being a Mets fan is like lending someone a lot of money and you just know that you'll never get paid back. "

" I have occasionally - if ever I do interviews that are difficult or nerve-wracking - I take my wife's dog tags and have them in my pocket because it's a very quick way to realize that what I'm doing is not that important. It's not really worth getting stressed about because it's not, you know, war. "

" We in Britain stopped evolving gastronomically with the advent of the pie. Everything beyond that seemed like a brave, frightening new world. We knew the French were up to something across the Channel, but we didn't want anything to do with it. "

" Every empire has to get sucked down the drain. As a British person, I know how it feels. "

" It's a great time to be doing political satire when the world is on a knife edge. "

" People in Britain see Richard Quest as a kind of an offensive cartoon character. "

" The British media is sinking down, as the American news media has lowered the bar for all of humanity. British news media is definitely trying to stoop down to that level. Everyone is stooping to the lowest common denominator. "

" People really have come for a dialogue when they go to a stand-up show in the U.K. They say, 'I understand that you have now finished your little comedy monologue; now I have something to say regarding what I've just heard. "