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" Having a human conversation is not something I've had any training in either as a comedian or as, you know, a human being. "

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" I find it hard in my general life to think further than the week ahead. "

" Politicians don't really bring up religion in England. "

" There are two kinds of hecklers: the destructive and constructive hecklers. "

" I would much rather America was a more stable, wonderful place. You know, I love it. "

" It's pretty physically unsettling, living life on a visa. "

" I knew I was going to go into the field and make fun of people to their faces. I knew what I was getting into. "

" If I wanted to take a more activist or journalistic slant in work, I should probably just go be an activist or a journalist. But I'm happy being a comedian. "

" Most stand-ups, once they have done it, think of it as their default job. I'm pretty sure Jon Stewart still feels that way now. You are a stand-up first; other things come and go. "

" You can write jokes at any point of the day. Jokes are not that hard to write, or they shouldn't be when it is literally your job. "

" I feel more at home knowing I'm not really at home. It takes all the pressure off you trying to fit in! "

" If you're asking me, would I have voted for Mitt Romney, the answer is absolutely not. Emphatically not. I cannot envision a world in which I would have voted for Mitt Romney unless I sustained a massive concussion. "

" I think puns are not just the lowest form of wit, but the lowest form of human behavior. "

" I did sketch comedy, but I never did improv. So I've just tried to learn as I go. "

" There is no greater anesthetic than sport. "

" I would never heckle someone. That's why I think I'm so interested in someone that would. "

" I get nostalgic for British negativity. There is an inherent hope and positive drive to New Yorkers. When you go back to Britain, everybody is just running everything down. It's like whatever the opposite of a hug is. "

" There is so much cross-pollination between the U.S. and Britain in terms of comedians. British TV comedies work well in the U.S. American stand-ups make it big in Britain. "

" I can't relax. I find vacations problematic. "

" If you work on a comedy show, your basic form of communication is teasing. That's generally how we speak to each other: you communicate the information between the lines of insulting sentences. "

" I'm not really much of an actor, so when I started on 'The Daily Show,' I was just trying to adopt the faux authority of a newsperson. Having a British accent definitely gave me a sonic leg up on that because there is a faux authority to the British accent in and of itself. "

" Here in America, people come out to see what they've known you to do. In England, it's like everyone comes out to tell you exactly how well they think you're doing. "

" I watch one news channel until my soul can't take it anymore. It's the background of my life. "

" The moment I accept that there's an artistic, redeeming quality in puns, I have a horrible feeling I'll get hooked. "

" It's exciting to have a role in anything that's Claymation, just because you're always intrigued by what a clay wizard version of yourself would be. "

" Stand-up comedy seems like a terrifying thing. Objectively. Before anyone has done it, it seems like one of the most frightening things you could conceive, and there's just no shortcut - you just have to do it. "

" I would hate to meet myself at 15. "

" I have exactly as much rhythm as you think I have. "

" The British media is sinking down, as the American news media has lowered the bar for all of humanity. British news media is definitely trying to stoop down to that level. Everyone is stooping to the lowest common denominator. "

" Veterans' issues are quite close to my heart. I find it quite hard to talk about, actually. "

" I really love stand-up. I'm more than happy to do it for nothing. I've come to America to do it for nothing. It's the American Dream: Work for free. "