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" I loved the Kennedy Center Honors because you just sit there, smile, wave, and cry. "

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" My grandmother and I would go see movies, and we'd come back to the apartment - we had a one-room apartment in Hollywood - and I would kind of lock myself in this little dressing room area with a cracked mirror on the door and act out what I had just seen. "

" I struggled for a while, but when I was cast in an Off Broadway show called 'Once Upon a Mattress,' that kind of put me on the map. "

" I think the hardest thing to do in the world, show-business-wise, is write comedy. "

" Just scream! You vent, and the body just feels good after a good old yell. "

" I love the writing. I love the idea of typing and seeing it on the computer and printing it out myself and, you know, moving sentences around. I like that. "

" I have an iPhone, and I can text, and I can use the phone, and I can even take pictures with it. "

" I'm like your mother, your sister, whatever. "

" I'm really not that funny in real life! But I am the best audience one could find. I love to laugh. "

" I'm so happy with what has happened in my life. "

" Adolescence is just one big walking pimple. "

" I love audiences. "

" I love to write. I have always loved writing. That was my first love. "

" I don't eat much meat, fish, or poultry. "

" I was very entertained by Betty Grable and Judy Garland. "

" I'm not a person who likes to confront. "

" I was raised going to the movies with my grandmother as a kid. And then I'd come home, and my best friend and I would act out the films that we saw. "

" When I was starting out in this business, that was the norm. You did it all. You looked around, and entertainers could dance, sing, play the piano, act, make you laugh. "

" On the good days, my mother would haul out the ukulele and we'd sit around the kitchen table - it was a cardboard table with a linoleum top - and sing. "

" If I go to a party, I'm not one to be the funniest person in the room at all. "

" Everybody I know who is funny, it's in them. You can teach timing, or some people are able to tell a joke, though I don't like to tell jokes. But I think you have to be born with a sense of humor and a sense of timing. "

" Giving birth is like taking your lower lip and forcing it over your head. "

" I liked myself better when I wasn't me. "

" I love 'Modern Family.' And I love 'Glee' - the singing, the music - Jane Lynch just kills me. "

" We all get where we're going by circuitous journeys, and some of the setbacks are warranted. "

" I eat very well, and I do Pilates. "

" We don't stop going to school when we graduate. "

" Jimmy Stewart and Lucille Ball were so unique. "

" I love Maya Rudolph. She's very multitalented herself. "

" I have a great memory. "

" Comedy is tragedy - plus time. "