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" I'd rather know a square guy than own a square mile. "

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" You sparkle with larceny. "

" A fellow who is always declaring he's no fool usually has his suspicions. "

" Popularity is exhausting. The life of the party almost always winds up in a corner with an overcoat over him. "

" Art is science made clear. "

" A drama critic is a person who surprises the playwright by informing him what he meant. "

" Gambling: The sure way of getting nothing for something. "

" The most efficient water power in the world - women's tears. "

" It is not in life, but in art that self-fulfillment is to be found. "

" If you steal from one author it's plagiarism; if you steal from many it's research. "

" The difference between chirping out of turn and a faux pas depends on what kind of a bar you're in. "

" I hate careless flattery, the kind that exhausts you in your efforts to believe it. "

" A slave has but one master. An ambition man, has as many as there are people who helped him get his fortune. "

" Hollywood is a sewer with service from the Ritz Carlton. "

" A good listener is not only popular everywhere, but after a while, he knows something. "

" In the battle of existence, Talent is the punch; Tact is the clever footwork. "

" All anger is not sinful, because some degree of it, and on some occasions, is inevitable. But it becomes sinful and contradicts the rule of Scripture when it is conceived upon slight and inadequate provocation, and when it continues long. "

" The cuckoo who is on to himself is halfway out of the clock. "

" I know of no sentence that can induce such immediate and brazen lying as the one that begins, 'Have you read - .' "

" There is something about a closet that makes a skeleton terribly restless. "

" To profit from good advice requires more wisdom than to give it. "

" Failure has gone to his head. "

" Most hard-boiled people are half-baked. "

" Don't talk about yourself; it will be done when you leave. "

" I've had ample contact with lawyers, and I'm convinced that the only fortune they ever leave is their own. "

" The best way to keep your friends is not to give them away. "

" If you count all your assets you always show a profit. "

" Be nice to people on your way up because you'll meet them on your way down. "

" To my embarrassment I was born in bed with a lady. "

" I've spent several years in Hollywood, and I still think the movie heroes are in the audience. "

" I can usually judge a fellow by what he laughs at. "