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" No sooner do we think we have assembled a comfortable life than we find a piece of ourselves that has no place to fit in. "
Gail Sheehy
Comfortable
Life
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" Creativity can be described as letting go of certainties. "
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" All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter into another! "
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" People in grief need someone to walk with them without judging them. "
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" This is something caregivers have to understand: You have to ask for help. You have to realize that you deserve to ask for help. Because you need to keep on working on your own life. "
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" My husband, Clay Felker, died 17 years after his first cancer due to secondary conditions that developed from treatment. "
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Years
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Clay
" I found the happiest woman in America is between 50 and 55, is happily married, has made significant progress in her career, and lives in a community where she can easily exercise outside. But the most important single thing was she had her last child before she was 35. "
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" Adapting to our Second Adulthood is not all about the money. It requires thinking about how to find a new locus of identity or how to adjust to a spouse who stops working and who may loll, enjoying coffee and reading the paper online while you're still commuting. "
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Coffee
" I'm a liberal, but I think there's so much that the private sector can do and does do. "
Gail Sheehy
Private
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" Would that there were an award for people who come to understand the concept of enough. Good enough. Successful enough. Thin enough. Rich enough. Socially responsible enough. When you have self-respect, you have enough. "
Gail Sheehy
Award
Good
People
" Like everyone else in the first weeks after the tragedy of 9/11, I was looking frantically for some way to help. "
Gail Sheehy
Way
Looking
Everyone
" No one can control the aging process or the trajectory of illness. "
Gail Sheehy
Control
Aging
Illness
" In rough times, pathfinders rely on work, friends, humor and prayer. They develop a support network. "
Gail Sheehy
Friends
Humor
Prayer
" I actually like getting out of my comfort zone. It shakes me up. "
Gail Sheehy
Up
Comfort
Comfort Zone
" In the case of my husband, we found that facing a life-threatening illness prodded us to make a dramatic change in our lives. "
Gail Sheehy
Illness
Dramatic
Husband
" Family caregiving has become a predictable crisis. Americans are living longer and longer but dying slower and slower. "
Gail Sheehy
Living
Crisis
Dying
" We have to move from the unbridled pursuit of self-gain at the expense of others to recovering appreciation for what we gain by caring and sharing with one another. "
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Caring
Appreciation
Others
" I do think taking the 20s to take the most chances you can is important, because you're not going to hurt anyone else during that time. And if you do have a partner, you need a couple years to rehearse that relationship. "
Gail Sheehy
Time
Think
Relationship
" Very few women manage to have it all; certainly not all at once. "
Gail Sheehy
Once
Very
Women
" It is a paradox that as we reach out prime, we also see there is a place where it finishes. "
Gail Sheehy
Paradox
Where
Place
" I was devastated when I got the review for my first book. The book came out a couple years before the women's movement broke through, and people were putting it down, asking, 'Why does the woman in this book need to get a divorce? Why can't she just shut up and be happy?' "
Gail Sheehy
Women
She
Woman
" Spontaneity, the hallmark of childhood, is well worth cultivating to counteract the rigidity that may otherwise set in as we grow older. "
Gail Sheehy
May
Older
Well
" Back in 1968, when I was 30, my entire life blew up. I had a life plan, and it collapsed for no rational reason. "
Gail Sheehy
Up
Back
Life
" I dare to do things - that's how I survive. "
Gail Sheehy
Survive
Dare
Things
" I do think women can have it all - but not all women. If you take daring steps and are smart about it, you can probably have it all. But you might have to wait a while. "
Gail Sheehy
Wait
You
Women
" Being a pathfinder is to be willing to risk failure and still go on. "
Gail Sheehy
Being
Risk
Still
" Jill Clayburgh's life so closely paralleled mine, I feel as though a part of me lived a little through her and died a little with her. "
Gail Sheehy
Lived
Feel
Through
" Character is what was yesterday and will be tomorrow. "
Gail Sheehy
Yesterday
Character
Tomorrow
" The secret of a leader lies in the tests he has faced over the whole course of his life and the habit of action he develops in meeting those tests. "
Gail Sheehy
Meeting
Action
Habit
" Stress overload makes us stupid. Solid research proves it. When we get overstressed, it creates a nasty chemical soup in our brains that makes it hard to pull out of the anxious depressive spiral. "
Gail Sheehy
Soup
Stress
Stupid
" Changes are not only possible and predictable, but to deny them is to be an accomplice to one's own unnecessary vegetation. "
Gail Sheehy
Changes
Own
Only