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" If you don't simply communicate with your spouse what household tasks you would like them to do, you are setting yourself up to be angry. "

Emily V. Gordon

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" Never marry because it seems like what you should do. "

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" Post-divorce, the world can feel harsh and full of jagged edges. "

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" I think it's lovely when people are more involved in local politics. "

Emily V. Gordon

" The period that directly follows the dissolution of a long term relationship is extremely volatile, with emotions running the gamut from misery to elation to relief to terror. "

Emily V. Gordon

" A lot of new stepparents fall into the trap of letting children disobey household expectations in order to gain favor with them. "

Emily V. Gordon

" Dealing with wedding stuff is a bit of a double-edged sword - it seems that divorcees are expected to either burn it all on the front lawn, tears silently coursing down their faces, or keep the stuff, shrine-like, concealed somewhere in their homes. "

Emily V. Gordon

" 'The Babadook,' written and directed by a woman, is a gorgeously told female-focused story of grief, longing, loneliness, and what mourning can become. "

Emily V. Gordon

" Nothing makes a girl feel as unsexy as divorce. "

Emily V. Gordon

" Do remember to pick your battles when you start parenting your stepchildren. "

Emily V. Gordon

" We all have an idea of how we like to be treated that we would like others to adhere to, and somehow we've gotten in our heads that the perfect person for us will just know what this code of behavior is. "

Emily V. Gordon

" A lot of people end up getting married more out of expectation than out of passion for each other, but if your options have ever been, 'We either get married or break up,' be careful. Marriage should be a new addition you add to the house that is your relationship, not the structure you impose on the house once it's already built. "

Emily V. Gordon

" Nothing makes me feel more mushy and full of love for my husband than going back and looking at our flirtation unfolding online. I love reading our old e-mails, texts, and Gchats. "

Emily V. Gordon

" I have a pretty intense work ethic. If something's not done, I cannot let go until I get it done. "

Emily V. Gordon

" In my experience as a therapist and as a friend, it seems that the majority of the breakup resources available are for women and not men. Women, who tend to be more vocal about their emotional struggles, are the squeaky wheel that gets the grease from friends, from online communities, from books, and from therapeutic approaches. "

Emily V. Gordon

" I haven't always been the best advocate for my own body. I was a too-tall, pudgy child who felt completely out of control of the genetic lottery ticket she'd been given, so in retaliation, I shut down. I ignored my body and hated it for not being tiny and cute like my friends' bodies. "

Emily V. Gordon

" Burlesque dancing didn't solve all my post-divorce problems, but what it did do was force me to court myself for a little while. "

Emily V. Gordon

" Sometimes new spouses don't fully process the commitment they've made until after the deal is done, and then they panic. "

Emily V. Gordon

" Don't expect yourself to immediately love your stepchildren. In fact, you may hate them for a bit. "

Emily V. Gordon

" Parents go to sleep early. This is universal. "

Emily V. Gordon

" You're not a victim of your divorce. What you decide to do with yourself and your personal life after your marriage ends is your decision, and completely under your control. "

Emily V. Gordon

" Without knowing your own history, you are doomed to repeat it. "

Emily V. Gordon

" I am fairly convinced that people plan destination weddings because they would actually like to elope but want to have given you the option to attend. "

Emily V. Gordon

" In my professional and personal life, when I meet people who feel broken after a divorce, they can usually be divided into two categories: those who truly believe there's something wrong with them, and those that are using their status as armor. "

Emily V. Gordon

" Sometimes we put so much effort into things we're doing, like dating or wedding planning, that we don't stop to think about whether or not we even want the results of that effort. "

Emily V. Gordon

" I definitely think, when you're a teenager, it's more forgiving to talk to strangers and go up to people at a mall or whatever. "

Emily V. Gordon

" Keeping physical items from the past is important - we keep old toys, grandparents' jewelry, yearbooks, dance recital programs - and we assign meaning to them. Those items become the memories, and that's a very healthy thing to do. The problems occur when we have too many of those sentimental items, and they start weighing us down. "

Emily V. Gordon

" When I was young and less wise, I thought that being a feminist meant being independent. It meant not sacrificing your needs for anyone else's and not relying on anyone else for even a smidgen of your happiness or well being. "

Emily V. Gordon

" I had a tightly knit group of female friends in elementary school - we called ourselves the Sensational Six. "

Emily V. Gordon

" After my divorce, I took some time off from having a romantic life to begin the tough work of figuring out where I'd gone wrong and what on Earth I could do to understand how to be a whole person in a relationship. "

Emily V. Gordon

" For so long, TV consisted of a limited number of shows a year, and those shows had to appeal to as many people as possible. The joy of TV now is that shows don't have to be broad anymore - they can be small, weird, and niche. "

Emily V. Gordon