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" The first thing one notices about Jill Abramson is her short stature. The second is her intensity. "
Gail Sheehy
Her
Second
Short
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" I do think women can have it all - but not all women. If you take daring steps and are smart about it, you can probably have it all. But you might have to wait a while. "
Gail Sheehy
Wait
You
Women
" My husband, Clay Felker, died 17 years after his first cancer due to secondary conditions that developed from treatment. "
Gail Sheehy
Years
Cancer
Clay
" Family caregiving has become a predictable crisis. Americans are living longer and longer but dying slower and slower. "
Gail Sheehy
Living
Crisis
Dying
" In 2009, I served as AARP's Ambassador of Caregiving. With a producer and cameraman, I traveled the country for months, interviewing hundreds of caregivers. "
Gail Sheehy
Ambassador
Country
Producer
" Stress overload makes us stupid. Solid research proves it. When we get overstressed, it creates a nasty chemical soup in our brains that makes it hard to pull out of the anxious depressive spiral. "
Gail Sheehy
Soup
Stress
Stupid
" In the first phase of shock over, say, your mortgage being called in or your job washed out, it's essential to engage with others and share the fear, release the feelings, do fun things to take your mind off it. "
Gail Sheehy
Say
Fear
Feelings
" I've had the experience of having a book praised but then it doesn't sell. Or not praised but then it sells. "
Gail Sheehy
Having
Then
Book
" I'm a liberal, but I think there's so much that the private sector can do and does do. "
Gail Sheehy
Private
Think
I Think
" We see it in the body, that if you just give the body enough rest and comfort, it has remarkable self-healing capacities. Well, so does the spirit. "
Gail Sheehy
Comfort
Spirit
Rest
" Married at 23, a mother at 24, and blindsided by divorce at 28, I found myself struggling, like many young women I meet today, to strike a balance between my personal life and my career. "
Gail Sheehy
Meet
Myself
Today
" It was my very good fortune to find a mentor, Clay Felker, who started my career at the 'New York Magazine' as a freelance writer when I had to quit my job at the 'Herald Tribune' to stay home with my young daughter. "
Gail Sheehy
Job
Good
Daughter
" People in grief need someone to walk with them without judging them. "
Gail Sheehy
Grief
Judging
People
" Like everyone else in the first weeks after the tragedy of 9/11, I was looking frantically for some way to help. "
Gail Sheehy
Way
Looking
Everyone
" Be willing to shed parts of your previous life. For example, in our 20s, we wear a mask; we pretend we know more than we do. We must be willing, as we get older, to shed cocktail party phoniness and admit, 'I am who I am.' "
Gail Sheehy
Admit
Life
Mask
" When men reach their sixties and retire, they go to pieces. Women go right on cooking. "
Gail Sheehy
Men
Reach
Women
" No one can control the aging process or the trajectory of illness. "
Gail Sheehy
Control
Aging
Illness
" Spontaneity, the hallmark of childhood, is well worth cultivating to counteract the rigidity that may otherwise set in as we grow older. "
Gail Sheehy
May
Older
Well
" We have to move from the unbridled pursuit of self-gain at the expense of others to recovering appreciation for what we gain by caring and sharing with one another. "
Gail Sheehy
Caring
Appreciation
Others
" It seems like, to me, somewhere between 30 and 35 is a really, really good time to turn your eggs into babies. "
Gail Sheehy
Me
Turn
Time
" You don't have to feel confident to act confident. In fact, it's the most important acting job you can learn. "
Gail Sheehy
Job
Acting
Feel
" Jill Clayburgh's life so closely paralleled mine, I feel as though a part of me lived a little through her and died a little with her. "
Gail Sheehy
Lived
Feel
Through
" To be tested is good. The challenged life may be the best therapist. "
Gail Sheehy
Good
Therapist
Tested
" No sooner do we think we have assembled a comfortable life than we find a piece of ourselves that has no place to fit in. "
Gail Sheehy
Comfortable
Life
Find
" Creativity can be described as letting go of certainties. "
Gail Sheehy
Go
Letting Go
Certainties
" I found the happiest woman in America is between 50 and 55, is happily married, has made significant progress in her career, and lives in a community where she can easily exercise outside. But the most important single thing was she had her last child before she was 35. "
Gail Sheehy
Progress
Woman
She
" Most women have learned a great deal about how to set goals for our First Adulthood and how to roll with the punches when we hit a rough passage. But we're less prepared for our Second Adulthood as we approach life after retirement, where there are no fixed entrances or exits, and lots of sand into which it is easy to bury our heads. "
Gail Sheehy
Women
Life
Goals
" Career-driven millennials are strategic about working obsessively while they are single and earning enough money to afford advanced education. Most are patient enough to wait until 30 or later to develop their dream. "
Gail Sheehy
Wait
Education
Dream
" I know I'm never going to probably see the Taj Mahal or, you know, climb Mt. Everest, but I can still maybe influence peoples' way of thinking by a story that I do, by something I learn about the world. "
Gail Sheehy
Influence
Story
Thinking
" All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter into another! "
Gail Sheehy
Changes
Behind
Most
" I'd visually have that idea. I'm diving off the end of the diving board. I'm not going to be worried about if I'm going to dive into a jellyfish or the water's going to be too cold or the boys are going to beat me. I'm just doing it. And if I do it, it's a good chance I'll make it. "
Gail Sheehy
Me
Water
Chance