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" The period that directly follows the dissolution of a long term relationship is extremely volatile, with emotions running the gamut from misery to elation to relief to terror. "
Emily V. Gordon
Long
Relationship
Misery
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" I grew up in a town where there were no Muslims whatsoever, and there was not a lot of exposure. "
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" Dealing with wedding stuff is a bit of a double-edged sword - it seems that divorcees are expected to either burn it all on the front lawn, tears silently coursing down their faces, or keep the stuff, shrine-like, concealed somewhere in their homes. "
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" In Hollywood, it seems that the people least successful at being married are the ones most eager to tie the knot over and over again. "
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" I'm not an actress. I'm a writer. "
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" Divorce is one of the most destructive, emotionally traumatic experiences a human being can go through, no matter if you're the instigator or the recipient. It's hard, and it hurts, and it takes a long time to feel normal again. "
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" I remember being a teenager and feeling like I could talk to anyone anywhere about anything. "
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" Things can be tough even when surrounded by nice Pottery Barn stuff. "
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Nice
Surrounded
" Sometimes we are much better at judging people based on how they treat everyone other than ourselves. We make a million excuses for why they treat us how they do. "
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" Without knowing your own history, you are doomed to repeat it. "
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" Your life story is a gift, and it should be treated as such. "
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" There's nothing like listening to the drone of QVC's always-bubbly pitchwomen, as they try to move loose-fitting tunics with 'just the right amount of sparkle,' to soothe you into a healing slumber. "
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" I am fairly convinced that people plan destination weddings because they would actually like to elope but want to have given you the option to attend. "
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" Men - not all men but a good majority of the ones I have known and worked with - tend to think of difficult situations in their lives as problems that need to be solved. "
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" I'm tired of hearing about 'Damages,' I don't care how life-changing 'The Wire' is, and I don't want to hear another word about 'Battlestar Galactica' or its super-awesome ending. "
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Ending
Care
Hear
" I definitely think, when you're a teenager, it's more forgiving to talk to strangers and go up to people at a mall or whatever. "
Emily V. Gordon
Think
You
Go
" Some divorcees turn their pain inward. They brood, and they grieve for a long time, always wondering if they could have done something differently to keep this from happening. They make every problem in their relationship into something they could have prevented. "
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Time
Long
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" Marriage isn't just about two people who fit together well. It's about two people who figure out how to fit together well. "
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" Your wedding day is supposed to be your big day, and yet a lot of engaged couples find that instead of creating an event that will be important to them, they're dodging through a minefield of modern etiquette traps. "
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Day
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" As any daytime judge show can tell you, spending someone's money or taking their stuff because they hurt your feelings is not justified. "
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Feelings
You
Tell
" We all have an idea of how we like to be treated that we would like others to adhere to, and somehow we've gotten in our heads that the perfect person for us will just know what this code of behavior is. "
Emily V. Gordon
Know
Person
Perfect
" Do remember to pick your battles when you start parenting your stepchildren. "
Emily V. Gordon
Parenting
You
Start
" Sometimes new spouses don't fully process the commitment they've made until after the deal is done, and then they panic. "
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Sometimes
Done
Commitment
" Keeping physical items from the past is important - we keep old toys, grandparents' jewelry, yearbooks, dance recital programs - and we assign meaning to them. Those items become the memories, and that's a very healthy thing to do. The problems occur when we have too many of those sentimental items, and they start weighing us down. "
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Past
Dance
Problems
" Experiences don't make us damaged goods; it's what we do with those experiences that matters. "
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Matters
Us
" Get married wherever you like, make accommodations for the people you love so they can attend, and forget about the people who can't. "
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" Everybody's got baggage, and not just the classic, 'Oh I have so much baggage,' but everyone comes with so much context, and you're not just dating a person: you're dating all their context, too. Part of relationships is negotiating each other's context. "
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You
" If you've experienced cheating in a new marriage, the real work is not obsessively combing through all the details of what happened, but rather figuring out if your relationship is worth saving. "
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" I haven't always been the best advocate for my own body. I was a too-tall, pudgy child who felt completely out of control of the genetic lottery ticket she'd been given, so in retaliation, I shut down. I ignored my body and hated it for not being tiny and cute like my friends' bodies. "
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" I am somewhat grateful to the disintegration of my marriage for teaching me a lot about myself and about relationships, and though I wish it hadn't been such a taxing lesson, I wouldn't change a thing. "
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" Parents go to sleep early. This is universal. "
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Sleep
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Universal