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" We are all in this together, by ourselves. "
Lily Tomlin
Ourselves
Together
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" There's so much plastic in this culture that vinyl leopard skin is becoming an endangered synthetic. "
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" The road to success is always under construction. "
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" What I appreciate is acknowledging to the audience that I think they have brains. "
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" If I had known what it would be like to have it all - I might have been willing to settle for less. "
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" I like a teacher who gives you something to take home to think about besides homework. "
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" But there are too many people that make so much money at the cost of lives of other humans and for no reason but to make the money. "
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" What is reality, anyway? Just a collective hunch. "
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" I grew up in a time when women didn't really do comedy. You had to be homely, overweight, an old maid, all that. You had to play a stereotype, because very attractive women were not supposed to be funny - because it's powerful; it's a threat. "
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" No matter how cynical you become, it's never enough to keep up. "
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" I especially love 'Web Therapy' and I did 'Eastbound and Down' too. I had a lot of fun doing that. "
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" It's my belief we developed language because of our deep inner need to complain. "
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Deep
Need
Complain
" Creating characters is just another way to express a type and put that type to use. "
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" When I was 9 or 10, I had a ten-cent business: I would walk your dog for a dime, go to the store for a dime, empty your garbage for a dime - and then I could use the money to buy tricks at the magic store. "
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Dog
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Money
" Instead of working for the survival of the fittest, we should be working for the survival of the wittiest - then we can all die laughing. "
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Then
" If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question? "
Lily Tomlin
Love
You
Question
" Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. "
Lily Tomlin
Need
Man
Complain
" We're all in this alone. "
Lily Tomlin
Alone
" Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet? "
Lily Tomlin
Feet
Why
Special
" Sometimes I feel like a figment of my own imagination. "
Lily Tomlin
Imagination
My Own
Feel
" I personally think we developed language because of our deep need to complain. "
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Complain
Think
Need
" What if it's boring - or if it's not boring, it might be too revealing, or worse, it might be too revealing and still be boring. "
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Worse
Still
Boring
" We don't care. We don't have to. We're the phone company. "
Lily Tomlin
Phone
Company
Care
" Ninety eight percent of the adults in this country are decent, hardworking, honest Americans. It's the other lousy two percent that get all the publicity. But then, we elected them. "
Lily Tomlin
Government
Two
Decent
" Many times I sit back and say, 'I can't believe that this is my life!' Other times, I feel self-satisfied. I mean, there's a lot to be proud and thankful for but, nonetheless, it's just a life! "
Lily Tomlin
My Life
Believe
Thankful
" Sometimes I worry about being a success in a mediocre world. "
Lily Tomlin
Being
World
Worry
" I always wondered why somebody doesn't do something about that. Then I realized I was somebody. "
Lily Tomlin
Always
Somebody
Something
" I guess that's one of the reasons that you do it - work all the time - because it's sort of a high to find something that really works. "
Lily Tomlin
You
Because
Find
" For fast-acting relief try slowing down. "
Lily Tomlin
Try
Slowing
Down
" I think my politics are just inclined to be empathetic and humanistic. I grew up with so many different kinds of people with different politics, different religion, no religion, no politics, education, no education, and I was infatuated with all of them. "
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Politics
Education
People
" If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in the library? "
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Funny
Hair
Truth Is