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" All kids should vote - it gives them the opportunity to whinge afterwards because you can't complain if you haven't voted. "

Dominic Holland

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" My Fiat Multipla is bright green - it looks like a frog. I look like a monkey, so between the two of us, we are a hideous prospect. It's the ugliest car on the road but the most practical, and I would live and die by it. "

Dominic Holland

" Invest your money safely. Avoid the risky lure of spectacular returns; go for an investment that cannot lose its value. This is why I have put all my spare cash into buying not shares, but thousands of penny chews. "

Dominic Holland

" I find it pressurising coming to the Voodoo Rooms to do my hour of comedy. "

Dominic Holland

" Many years ago, I was a young and, dare I say it, very hot new comedian. Maybe even the hottest of all if the now defunct Perrier panel of judges were to be believed. "

Dominic Holland

" I was spectacularly average at school, while my two brothers did really well academically. But my dad never said I didn't try hard enough. He knew I did my best. "

Dominic Holland

" When I phoned up and said, 'Mum, I'm doing a 52-date national tour with Eddie Izzard,' she said 'That's nice, dear. How are you?' "

Dominic Holland

" When I do a show, I jot little notes for me to remember, and when the show is done and forgotten, I chuck them all over the car. My wife goes nuts. "

Dominic Holland

" I'm a confident person next to the guy in the street, but if you go into the showbiz world, it seems the guys who are most successful are the most confident, and I don't think I fit into that category. "

Dominic Holland

" It's because finance is so baffling that makes being an economist such a safe option. It nestles down comfortably with psychiatry and astrology as a profession where getting it patently wrong is just not a problem - and also, rather wonderfully, seems to have no adverse affect on their professional standing whatsoever. "

Dominic Holland

" I like to call myself numerically dyslexic, but officially, I am mathematically thick. "

Dominic Holland

" How I've fed my kids over the years is by doing stand-up comedy in clubs. "

Dominic Holland

" Where I live in south London, it is a very Tory area, so a Labour vote is a wasted vote. My leanings would certainly be not to vote Tory. "

Dominic Holland

" Edinburgh is a world city, visited throughout the year for its beauty and history, but in August, it is the City of Hope. There is something very exciting and romantic about performers of all shapes and sizes, honing their stuff for the biggest arts festival in the world. "

Dominic Holland

" I've been recognised in garages. I'll be paying for my petrol, and I'll see this guy looking at me, thinking, 'Is it him?' Then he'll be looking at my car: 'No, he couldn't be driving that car.' I've actually had two people say to me:,'Hello Dominic, I thought you might have a better car than that, mate!' "

Dominic Holland

" Seeing a full room of punters queuing for my show is always heartening. "

Dominic Holland

" My story is comic because I've spent vast amounts of effort trying to become a Hollywood screenwriter and made no direct effort on making my son a movie actor. "

Dominic Holland

" I am the first to admit that I have never been a household name. "

Dominic Holland

" I just talk about the funny things in my life, and the idea is that my observations reflect the lives of my audience - so people are really laughing at themselves. This is the theory, anyway, and I am aware that in print, that it doesn't appear to be very funny. But it is, and I am definitely funny. "

Dominic Holland

" I don't like false modesty. "

Dominic Holland

" It's not cool to be star-struck. "

Dominic Holland

" My job is to make people laugh. If I've upset them instead, then I haven't done my job properly. "

Dominic Holland

" A barrel of laughs should be enough, but it's not. A good review is official and endures. A bad one is like a tub of Flora. It spreads easily and lasts for the whole festival. "

Dominic Holland

" The garden is something I always try to get into, but it always beats me. "

Dominic Holland

" Growing up, I was always enthralled by Ronnie Barker. He made my dad howl with laughter, which always intrigued me, and he had the rare gift of being as good a performer as he was a writer. "

Dominic Holland

" Making people laugh is the only thing I've ever done naturally. "

Dominic Holland

" I might get a break again, and I might get back on telly. If I don't, I'll just keep doing stand-up and doing the best gigs I can. "

Dominic Holland

" There is nothing quite as loud as the silence of an audience when a comedian is on stage. "

Dominic Holland

" I've written 'Eclipsed' as a funny story. It is completely bonkers. "

Dominic Holland

" I am not a natural show-off. Some of the monster comedians are terrifyingly assured, and I don't have that, and that's held me back. "

Dominic Holland

" Edinburgh is the most pressurised environment to do comedy. You get an hour. There's no compere. You'd better be on the money straight away; you've got journalists in. "

Dominic Holland